Friday it will be 8 months since I lost Brad

Friday it will be 8 months since I lost Brad.And the trauma of finding him in the yard will always be with me.Brad commited suicide and I am still out of it.This is a subject that I cant talk about.In fact there are several subjects that are sore to me and I will list them.1.My mother.2.money 3.brad 4.politics 5. religion.....................................religion is a sore subject to me and i tell you why.I was raised by the Irish Catholic nuns and even tho I havent gone to church in a long time,I still believe in some of the matter that was given to me.I dont believe that Brad is in Hell.......I believe that Brad is in peace.He was a very tortured person and he knew it.But Brad had the option of turning his life around ,but he didnt want to work.All he wanted to do was to collect unemployment and stay on his computer.He also wasnt very social.Brad didnt celebrate Xmas ,holidays or birthdays.Nor did he celebrate anniversarys.He just was a somber person and towards the end our relationship was bad and was falling apart at the seams.Brad didnt want to give and this is wrong.I felt sorry for him towards the end and I miss him...i miss him very much but I must get my life together and I will sing again.I am doing karoke on the 29th of January..and I cant wait to sing! Brad resented when i sang and he resented when Ipracticed...Guys...my music is very important to me and I refuse to give it up.so dont ask me to.