Friday
This morning my little cat layed next to me and put his paw on my hand as to comfort me. Drs appt today and I will be glad to have answer about this pain Im feeling. I cleaned my desk out yesterday and prepared for the worst that could happen. Its why I never really got comfortable in my space. I had a bad day at work and I feel my boss flipped the switch on me. Shes been snippy and short with me. Im not letting it bother me...lord knows ive paid my share of unemployment in and have never used it.
My "friend" from Ft Lauderdale called.
She asked me what I was going to do and I told her Im leaning toward moving up North. She then told me she thought I was making bad decisions. I told her I had to go and that id talk to her soon. This is coming from someone whos never wanted her whole life and is living with a man she doesnt love. I try and understand her point of view and maybe shes right...maybe i should just stay unhappy in the situation Im in. My head says yes but my heart reminds me that I only have 1 life. I dont want to keep checking the regret box.
More than ever I wish I had a one room shack in the woods...no phone...just books...enough to eat and a place to sleep. To all...I hope you have a Happy Friday and a peaceful weekend.
Replies
It was my one room shack in the woods which convinced me I really do need to accept my place in the human species, like it or knot. Knot. Humans are a gregarious species, like it or knot. Knot. Acceptance takes the cutting edge off the less palatable facts of my life. I still don't like it, butttttttaaaaaaaa. . . Life is as life is rather than the way I would have it. Onward through the fog.
My shack is long gone, along with the woods it sat in, but I still retreat there mentally on a fairly routine basis. Usually with nylon tent walls in place of that worm eaten wood but often within my therapy "Safe Place" exercises. TBH, it isn't my most effective therapy "Safe Place."
More encouragement to take itsy bitsy baby steps through the proverbial storm. ^It^ is allot to sort, my sister-in-healing.
Awwwww! Our pets know when we are in distress, don't they? Wish all your DS friends could give you a real hug.
I am that way also. I would be happy in a cardboard box in the woods.! All I would need is some books to read to occupy my time.