Friday
OK well today is Friday and the day is almost over...OMG I was so busy today that I almost fainted. It is kind of wierd because I ate normal meals and snacks and I still felt like passing out. What is wrong with this bosy? Well I got 10 hours of sleep in the past 48 hours so that could be it. I went to the doctor and got put on BC. OOOKKK I am scared tot ake it because I don't want to have a period. I also don't want to gain weight. I was blunt with my nutritionist. I told her that I need a meal plan and I need it to the exact measures because umm...hello? Does it look like I know what a serving of something is? I mean I do but I don't know how many servings of anything I should be having. She agreed and so we got that done. I also have to take a crapload of vitimins. WAH! The other things I did today was went to COstco and went to an OA meeting. So I was up and about since 5 this morning. I don't feel tired mentally though becaus there is so much I still have to do. Like laudry and cleaning and finnishing my grocery shopping and planning out my week and etc etc. UGH!!! One more week of work and I am done thank god because it is killing me. OK I CAN DO THIS!!! I can last the whole week. Come on Dominque get it together. Stop being lazy!!! OK I should go do the million things I need to do so wish me luck and I love you all on this site. No seriously I eat my meals at my computor on this site to not lose focus on my recovery. I feel stuffed, but I feel like I am eating with you guys and it makes me feel better. One more thing...I feel like in my head, I am planning my next binge and I think it might be tomorrow...ED wanted me to binge today but luckily for me, we are both tired and we both know that we won't be able to purge because of how tired we are. Maybe ED will be tired tomorrow too...I hope. I know this sounds wierd, but I am thinking aobut binge foods and what I will buy etc,It is like I am getting so comforted knowing that the binge is a short time away. hmm
Replies
Try running all the very real negative aspects of a binge through your head over and over. I\'ve been experimenting with brainstorming in my journals and I find that it helps. Try just listing as many thing hat come to your head and then reread it when you\'re finished. Hope it works for you if you try it :)