Freedom 45

I've left him about 5 days after never thinking I could. Am astounded because I feel much stronger than I thought I would. Am embarrassed and humiliated that I lied to myself at just how much I let him hurt me. The relief he is gone is palpable and my new calmer mood has been visibly noticed. I was actually more frazzled with him than without and I thought that would be the opposite. Now I feel lonely. But I will never ever let anyone treat me like he did, not ever again. I don't care what it takes. ALl the time I made excuses for him, he knew he was hurting me and enjoyed my pain. Forward, now. No looking back. He isn't who I thought he was so no grieving.