Fool me once shame on you...fool me twice, well that's on me

So I took him back, two years has been good, and living together for the last 8 months has been good until the past few weeks when the "wife" (ex but he's not divorced only legally separated for 8 years) called to say she wants to sell the house and they need to get it fixed up to sell.  Well upon going up there, something was said or done and reminiscing started bc he's been cold, can't look at me, distant, etc.  I think he's confused about having it over and done with and having me as an option 2.  Well, I can't live like this....I need to just vent and get it done and over with then move on.  I can't...I love him, I really do but sometimes love just isn't going to be enough and I am sick of being the fall back person, and one that pays for it all monetarily and emotionally.