Food for thought..and survival

  I just stayed up until 4am listening to my friend talk about her 3 kids and horrible ex-husband. I don't mean to be mean, but it's like she doesn't help herself and is always thinking negative. Everytime we hang out, she tells me a new incident that her ex did to her kids when they go over to his house every other weekend. I try to give her advice and I always scramble up whatever knowledge I have on trying to help her with her situation, but it's like she keeps on telling me either that I just don't understand how it is to have kids or she doesn't even consider whatever advice I give her; it's as if she doesn't even acknowledge it. That's why I got kinda upset, but I just tried. Then I told her my situation at home and she practically tells me that whatever I'm going through is considered small to what she's going through!! That really pissed me off!! To me, it doesn't matter how small or big. WE ALL GO THROUGH ISSUES AND TRIALS in life! All that everyone needs is someone to support them and help them. The amount of hurt and trauma in a person's situation is in the heart of the beholder. Everyone's different, therefore I expected her to understand which seemed like she really couldn't. I got so mad that I just started to talk angrily at her and told her that I needed somebody to support and understand me, and be on my side for once. Then I just started to blurt out how angry and frustrated I was living here with my mom. When we calmed down, we apologized and hugged each other. I told her we needed to try to stay positive through these times. She's a really good friend and even though we have our misunderstandings, she's always able to be open and honest about her feelings concerning our friendship, which is something that not alot of people can do. We've been friends for 3 years and I'm hoping that ours can grow. When she went home last night, I wondered if this fight was either going to break our friendship or enable it to grow stronger. I'm hoping for the latter; and after all we went through as being friends and there for each other, I'm still willing to be her friend, and I'm always going to lean on the positive and hope for the best. I know it's strange to be learning these skills now that I'm 30, but I'm starting to learn what it truely means to be a friend. Usually, when a friend, no matter how long I've had a friendship with them, argues or causes conflict with me, I usually stop talking to them. But now, I'm realizing that being a true friend is when you can get over the storms. Compared to all the support she gave me when I needed it through these years, this one crazy fight just taught me that even though we get angry, we need to let go, and move foward and stay positive...because sometimes that's all we truely have left to survive in this world of chaos.