First Dream

I had my first dream with the guy who raped me in it. I was walking all around my school and he kept being in every place i was. The thing i remember the most was when i was outside he was running with a gym class and kept passing me and i ignored him and looked away. The next thing i knew a friend on our bus came and said hello to me and he came up to talk to him. I was really mad and just didn't answer when he talked to me. Then he said something and I said don;t talk to me ever again. He was asked why and i ran away but he followed me. The friend i was with also was confused and wanted to know, and i didn't want him to know and don't in real life. Then he chased after me into the guidance office but the whole school was empty. He asked why and i told him because he raped me. And he denied it and our friend heard. He told everyone that i was just a girl he had sex with and i was accusing him of rape. And then it ended. I guess it makes sense. I think if he knew why i was ignoring him and i told him because he raped me he'd deny it. and its hard for me to explain when i don't answer him to other people on the bus that I'm not just being a bitch like he tells everyone because he said he didn't do anything to me and I'm a bitch. i want people to know what he did, i want him to suffer. The day before he had one of our old neighbors going to his house (same bus stop i get off with him) and the guy came up with him and i was just falling asleep and he was like hey. i was taken by surprise and i didn't wanna say anything to the guy who raped me because our neighbor would think i was being a bitch and they'd prob talk about me behind my back. I want so bad for him to know what he did, want to tell him i know what he did and what a horrible person he is. I don't want to have to get onto my bus everyday with him and have to deal with the stress of hoping he wont be standing at the end of my driveway. I don't want him everywhere i go. ever time i see him i feel naked, i feel so exposed and lately I've been wearing baggy clothes and don't care what i look like. I feel violated by him just being near me. I want it to go away and i need to tell more friends because i cant handle this sadness alone.