First childbirth class today! yeeehaaa!!
I'm so looking forward to this!! I go to the midwife at 3pm and that's where the fun starts.
There are 8 classes in total between now and mid-April. They like you to finish at least a month before your due date so that's spot on.
I've no idea what to expect. I can't really remember anything about the classes I attended in '99 when I was PG with DD although I do remember that DH came to every single one. He actually asked me about this the other day and I told him he wasn't allowed. I don't want him there and I don't think it will make any difference in the long run. As far as I'm concerned he just needs to be there to take me to hospital and to fetch and carry stuff as required.
I think the day I give birth is going to be the biggest shock of his life. Really. I mean, he has ignored this pregnancy for almost 7 months now and I personally wonder what goes through his mind sometimes. I think it's sad that it's actually only going to hit him on the day it happens and I suspect he will be in such a state anyway, that he will be pretty much useless on the day. I'd rather that he make sure that DD is picked up from school, looked after, fed, brought to the hospital....rather than pretend that this event is something that he "wants" to attend when I know it's not the case. I have no doubt that that will be the extent of his usefulness to me. I've said before in previous journals that I'm not even sure I want him at the birth. I'm just not comfortable with him being there for the occasion and "pretending" to want to be there, knowing that for the last 9 months, he couldn't have cared less. It doesn't feel right. He doesn't deserve to be part of it.
Anyway, things may change but I doubt it. It may look like I'm shutting him out but in honesty, he's not fighting to get into the swing of things anyway so whatever happens, I'll be more than happy to go there and give birth on my own. The thing that DOES bother me though will be the aftermath. Coming home to a house that's too small, to a husband that doesn't care about his son and he is likely to not want to have anything to do with. So different from when DD was born when we were literally fighting over who gets to hold her, change her, burp her....."My turn!! My turn!!". I can see PPD looming already. Must get passports organised as soon as DS is born so I can get us the hell out of here for a few weeks as soon as physically possible.
So I'm off to see what the midwife has in store for us. Hopefully she'll be able to give me a date to visit the hospital. I've been there so many times as an outpatient and visitor but I've never been in the delivery area. I'm intrigued.
Annoyingly, my friend who gave birth a few months ago has started giving me all the "shoulds" and "should nots" for my "birth plan" and I'm really pissed off that someone would want to tell me how to do this. She kind of treats me as a FTM and I had to tell her nicely the other day that, yes, some people have a genuine need to control what's going to happen during labour and delivery and that they have plans drawn up months before hand. Sometimes it works, sometimes nature takes all control away from you and you cannot have your own way without risking baby or mom. I'm happy to go with the flow. If there is really something that stands out as not acceptable to me, then I may put up a fight but until then, I'm a go with the flow kind of girl.
The things I worry most about are forgetting stuff in my bag, my own creature comforts because I'm treating this hospital stay kind of like a holiday!!!!! Roll on mid-May!!!!!!
There are 8 classes in total between now and mid-April. They like you to finish at least a month before your due date so that's spot on.
I've no idea what to expect. I can't really remember anything about the classes I attended in '99 when I was PG with DD although I do remember that DH came to every single one. He actually asked me about this the other day and I told him he wasn't allowed. I don't want him there and I don't think it will make any difference in the long run. As far as I'm concerned he just needs to be there to take me to hospital and to fetch and carry stuff as required.
I think the day I give birth is going to be the biggest shock of his life. Really. I mean, he has ignored this pregnancy for almost 7 months now and I personally wonder what goes through his mind sometimes. I think it's sad that it's actually only going to hit him on the day it happens and I suspect he will be in such a state anyway, that he will be pretty much useless on the day. I'd rather that he make sure that DD is picked up from school, looked after, fed, brought to the hospital....rather than pretend that this event is something that he "wants" to attend when I know it's not the case. I have no doubt that that will be the extent of his usefulness to me. I've said before in previous journals that I'm not even sure I want him at the birth. I'm just not comfortable with him being there for the occasion and "pretending" to want to be there, knowing that for the last 9 months, he couldn't have cared less. It doesn't feel right. He doesn't deserve to be part of it.
Anyway, things may change but I doubt it. It may look like I'm shutting him out but in honesty, he's not fighting to get into the swing of things anyway so whatever happens, I'll be more than happy to go there and give birth on my own. The thing that DOES bother me though will be the aftermath. Coming home to a house that's too small, to a husband that doesn't care about his son and he is likely to not want to have anything to do with. So different from when DD was born when we were literally fighting over who gets to hold her, change her, burp her....."My turn!! My turn!!". I can see PPD looming already. Must get passports organised as soon as DS is born so I can get us the hell out of here for a few weeks as soon as physically possible.
So I'm off to see what the midwife has in store for us. Hopefully she'll be able to give me a date to visit the hospital. I've been there so many times as an outpatient and visitor but I've never been in the delivery area. I'm intrigued.
Annoyingly, my friend who gave birth a few months ago has started giving me all the "shoulds" and "should nots" for my "birth plan" and I'm really pissed off that someone would want to tell me how to do this. She kind of treats me as a FTM and I had to tell her nicely the other day that, yes, some people have a genuine need to control what's going to happen during labour and delivery and that they have plans drawn up months before hand. Sometimes it works, sometimes nature takes all control away from you and you cannot have your own way without risking baby or mom. I'm happy to go with the flow. If there is really something that stands out as not acceptable to me, then I may put up a fight but until then, I'm a go with the flow kind of girl.
The things I worry most about are forgetting stuff in my bag, my own creature comforts because I'm treating this hospital stay kind of like a holiday!!!!! Roll on mid-May!!!!!!
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