Finally Making progress
After telling my husband for the 1 millionth time that I am not happy, nor will being married to him ever make me happy, he has finally agreed that we should sit down together with an attorney and get the paperwork over and done with. This is one of the hardest things that I've ever done in my life, however, I feel a sense of relief that this misery is finally going to be over with!
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Well it has been several months since our divorce. The strange thing is that we get alone much better now. He makes an effort to talk to me and to listen. Why on earth didn\'t the fuckard do that during our 20 year marriage. He has waited a whole year after I moved out to change his way. I really like the ways in which he has changed. He is behaving the way that I wanted him to kind, caring, he listens, he is honest with his feelings..Quite frankly, I don\'t trust him. After being emotionally absent from or marriage for so long, I don\'t trust that his changes are permanent. I keeping thinking that the bastard in him will emerge the minute that I take him back. so I\'m going to wait this one out. He is going to have to really prove himself to me. I will not let anyone treat me like crap ever again. I\'m too valuable. Besides it\'s kind of nice being in control of my own life. I\'m am no longer devastated nor am I looking for anyone else to fill my needs. I do get lonely sometimes and I question why God has allowed my life to be so painful. Nevertheless, I\'m healing......