Finally Back

I have been away from this site for over 2 years.  I joined the military and became really busy.  Unfortunately, I might be separating.  It would be under good terms, but I'm still terrified about what I'll be doing afterwards.  Don't have a job yet or a car.  Wish I would have stayed connected to this site this whole time.  Been struggling with my physical training.  Looking back now I wish I would have done things differently.  Don't know how to tell my family.  I know they will support me but I'm still afraid.
If I would have opened up more and let people in, I probably would have gotten the support I needed.  I only made a couple of friends, nut we have been fading away.  Its weird, as badly as I want to get close to other people and get into relationships, I just can't get myself to do it.  I am too shy and feel that other people don't get me or think I'm weird.
Can't see the future but I just hope I can make it through whatever it has for me.  Hopefully I will come back and stay at this site so I don't lose everything.