Fighting

We had a huge fight over the week end.  I got really angry and told him to f! off.  I have never done that before.  It was partly due to the fight but I know that I have been feeling angry at his betrayal lately and I just boiled over. We talked the next day and worked things out. I guess I just needed to let it out.  He is so attentive now but somedays I grieve for the loss of our original relationship, the "innocence" and security I felt.  I don't think I wll ever feel completely safe again. I will keep trying to live in the present.