Feelings of sadness

well this is another new day being alone.  I made a decision not to call or text in any way to my stbx.  I feel like I am abandoning her in a way.  but she has chosen this path and left me with no other choice to follow.  So here i go waking up in the middle of the night, lonely and miserable, wanting her but hearing and seeing exactly what they were taunting me about sunday nite.  makes me feel no good.  I know that this is a story that will continue on.  Names will be changing, faces will be different, but the hurting, pain and suffering passes on.  Why?  Why does someone you share life with, love feverishly, desire only them and would do anything for them, why is it that they decide your not worth it and step all over your love? 

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Just remember that today is not the rest of your life. It seems like i at the time. When u think of the bad things she\'s done, that will help because you\'ll realize you don\'t want a bad person. Is there a church near you where u could join a Single\'s Sunday school class. It would also give you and your daughter something to do together and you might meet the real true love of your life and be happier than you ever dreamed. Just a thought. Sorry for your pain. I remember it many, many years ago, but now, he has zero power over me and I\'m truly glad to be rid of him and he begged me not to divorce him,but he\'d killed what I felt 30 years ago.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I cant get my ex out of my head either
deleted_user
deleted_user

There is two things in my experience that will make a difference for you on this journey.

1. No Contact - we have talked about it before, but you are seeing what happens when you do have contact. The hurt, the anger, the confusion, and on and on. Contact with her right now keeps you pulled in and stops you from continuing, for a while, on the journey.

Without contact, the love fades. Without the love, you lose the doubts and desires that are plaguing you. And finally you will see her for the person she truly is.

2. Time - What you are experiencing is not something that gets better in a day or a week or a month. You will get there. At some point, you will realize you haven\'t thought about her for ten minutes. Then an hour. Then a day.

At some point when you do think about her, you will realize that rather than the sharp pain you felt, the pain is dull or distant. In the end you will finally realize that when you do think of her, you don\'t feel pain at all.

My personal journey took about 6 - 7 months after DDay, but when you add the time in prior to DDay when we had split, it was more like a year.

So my friend, if I could give you presents for the holiday season, it would be the gifts of No Contact, and an understanding that time does indeed heal this wound.

Take care.
lostdaddy
lostdaddy

Thank you, these are things i want to do and things i dont want to do. confused? yes but as you said, life goes on and I need to let her go, forgive her and give her space. Only God knows what will happen to her but for 6 years, I loved mightily, gave wholeheartedly, and was completely hers. Now I have a wonderful daughter who loves her daddy so very much. In time love fades, hurts mend, and life moves forward. It will take those sleepless night to get there, those long lonely days, but soon it will all blend together into another picture, one that covers the other up. God give me Mercy and Grace to endure until that time