Feeling wiped out...
I tried to get up and get everyone to church today. And believe it or not we made it there by 11:00. I felt weak and tired like I have the flu, as usual. I really don't know if this is a mono thing or a fibro thing, does it matter?! I left church early after only one hour, my hips aching and my body done. Came home and my hubby and kids wanted to eat out, so I dragged along and tried to join in the best I could. Then we had two errands to run, so I stayed in the car and fell asleep.
When we got home I slept on the couch for about an hour and a half, I am now up and put away the clean dishes from the dishwasher and resting more while I update my journal. I have taken one shake yesterday and one today, I can tell a difference since I stopped taking two a day, and sometimes three. I will hopefully pick them back up once I get back to work, from being off with this mono. My next check will only have 4 hours on it, and then it will be two weeks before my next one. I have a horrible headache, and will take something for it when I am done here.
I don't know what I am going to do if all I can work is two days a week, but I really don't feel like I can handle more right now, it seems like every time I get a flare I end up worse than I was before with the fatigue. I am going to ask my doctor about chronic fatigue, and I know he will want me to take sleeping pills but I can't function on them. I have to remember to try to take things one day at a time, but it is so hard. The first couple of days on the steroids were awesome I felt like I was my old self. Lots of energy and motivation to do so much, then as quickly as it came it left. It makes me sad, like part of myself has died. I have so much to do, and need to be a better parent to both my daughters, but I feel like I can't do the littlest things without it taking all I've got. Some quality of life. No one sees the real me, just the "sick" me. Enough feeling sorry for myself, it is what it is. j
When we got home I slept on the couch for about an hour and a half, I am now up and put away the clean dishes from the dishwasher and resting more while I update my journal. I have taken one shake yesterday and one today, I can tell a difference since I stopped taking two a day, and sometimes three. I will hopefully pick them back up once I get back to work, from being off with this mono. My next check will only have 4 hours on it, and then it will be two weeks before my next one. I have a horrible headache, and will take something for it when I am done here.
I don't know what I am going to do if all I can work is two days a week, but I really don't feel like I can handle more right now, it seems like every time I get a flare I end up worse than I was before with the fatigue. I am going to ask my doctor about chronic fatigue, and I know he will want me to take sleeping pills but I can't function on them. I have to remember to try to take things one day at a time, but it is so hard. The first couple of days on the steroids were awesome I felt like I was my old self. Lots of energy and motivation to do so much, then as quickly as it came it left. It makes me sad, like part of myself has died. I have so much to do, and need to be a better parent to both my daughters, but I feel like I can't do the littlest things without it taking all I've got. Some quality of life. No one sees the real me, just the "sick" me. Enough feeling sorry for myself, it is what it is. j
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