Feeling of dispair

I cannot remember the last day that I have gone through without feeling blah.  I'm taking my meds correctly.  They never really helped anyway, although I'm deathly afraid to stop them but at times I just get so fed up with my feelings.  It's driving me crazy, I'm not joking.  I sometimes feel as if I am having an out of body experience.  really can't explain it.  Just something new to worry about.  They say stress kills.  If that turns out to be true in which I believe it is, I'm in deep shit.  Pardon my mouth, but I'm at my wits end.  If something doesn't change soon I feel as if I could burst into flames.