Feeling inadequate
I don't know if it's the disease or the treatment but I dont know how much longer I can successfully do my job.
I am a travel agent employed by American Express to sell high end corporate travel. I feel truly blessed by my coworkers with whom I have been very open regarding my disease, various 'episodes', pain levels, etc. They are the best, hands down, my boss included.
I work twice as hard as the others, double and triple checking everything I do and every account I touch. It is a very stressful job, stress=bad things for us Lupies.
I use to be an Area Governor for Toastmasters. I was a lecture at my church, Eucharistic minister, sewed and washed altar cloths, ran workshops. I even worked in the wardrobe department for the 2002 Winter Olympics, all while working full time.
I'm down to my job and my house and honestly feel overwhelmed most days with just that.
My birthday is coming up and it is awesome, 11-11-11. Of course, being me (husband calls me Freaky T) I think that God is speaking directly to me (nope, not hearing voices) The number eleven is blessed in numerology, the number three is sacred in my religion (Holy Trinity). I'm going to drive to Idaho (no lottery in Utah) and buy 11 tickets in each of 3 lotteries on my birthday (Man I hope it's not in a snow storm)
If I could get the bills paid down, right the house in our upside down mortgage, I'd be under so much less stress. I'd just work until I couldn't anymore and retire to raise and train German Shepherds.
I am a travel agent employed by American Express to sell high end corporate travel. I feel truly blessed by my coworkers with whom I have been very open regarding my disease, various 'episodes', pain levels, etc. They are the best, hands down, my boss included.
I work twice as hard as the others, double and triple checking everything I do and every account I touch. It is a very stressful job, stress=bad things for us Lupies.
I use to be an Area Governor for Toastmasters. I was a lecture at my church, Eucharistic minister, sewed and washed altar cloths, ran workshops. I even worked in the wardrobe department for the 2002 Winter Olympics, all while working full time.
I'm down to my job and my house and honestly feel overwhelmed most days with just that.
My birthday is coming up and it is awesome, 11-11-11. Of course, being me (husband calls me Freaky T) I think that God is speaking directly to me (nope, not hearing voices) The number eleven is blessed in numerology, the number three is sacred in my religion (Holy Trinity). I'm going to drive to Idaho (no lottery in Utah) and buy 11 tickets in each of 3 lotteries on my birthday (Man I hope it's not in a snow storm)
If I could get the bills paid down, right the house in our upside down mortgage, I'd be under so much less stress. I'd just work until I couldn't anymore and retire to raise and train German Shepherds.
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