Feeling extra Lost and lonely

Tomorrow is my 48th Birthday. Its been bothering me because I am feeling extra lost and lonely for my husband. This has been the worst pain I have endured. I pray to our Lord and Savior for comfort and healing everyday. The last few days have been extra hard. This will be the first birthday I celebrate without him in 27 years. I know God has a plan for my life and I know I have to wait patiently for my new purpose in life. I just want the pain to go away. Sometimes I feel like I am going forward but then take a backward step like today and fall apart. I know my husband is in Heaven but I wonder if he will remember us or know if it will be my Birthday tomorrow? My Birthday wish is for him to visit me in my dreams again. I hope that is not asking for too much. I have only dreamt of him once since he passed away on October. It was the best dream. It felt like as though he never left. I dont usually remember my dreams but this one was so clear and vivid in my mind and I remember waking up so sad that it ended. I love and miss you so much Hon.