feeling embarassed

monday;1234 uk timegot up so early for our sunday carbooth sale.didn't want to because bec i was so tired from last saturday's shift but i know i'm going to feel good after this event so then i tried my best to get and ready.but unfortunately it rained and so we have to pack up.we decided t attend church at 11 am.can feel that i wasn't realy up to it but since i was already with my friends and they're both want to go then have no choice but to go with them.at the beginning of the ceremony i knew i couldn't concentrate .my mind kept wandering around.but during the homily i knew where the priest's sermon was going...about dying...i was trying to hold my tears but i couldn't and i knew i was going to burst so i went to the toilet to cry then when i felt i can hold it i went back to my seat only to find out i really can't finish the ceremony.so i said to my friends i'll just wait for them in the car.so i went out and there i sobbed.i felt really stupid, embarrassed to people who saw me,frustrated and ...i don't know i guess..just generally tired of everything...i wish i can just shut my brain off and forget what i really feel or more so forget who i am.so i went home and tried my best to get some sleep.which thank God i  managed.but sadly it didn't change the way i feel.