Feeling Blue tonight
I am not totally certain why...but I am feeling pretty blue tonight.
Oldest GD turned 7 yrs old on Tuesday. We are keeping very busy and have something going on every night. I might have over booked us. *sigh*
Yesterday would have been my late husband's 59th birthday, had he of lived. He died when he was 40, just short of his 41st bday leaving me to raise our 4.5 yr old daughter and 3.5 yr old son. For my sake, I did remarry but things haven't worked out between my son and new husband. I can't say much as things between his oldest daughter and myself aren't great either.
The weather is in a state of flux....hot, humid, brief rain showers, etc and suppose to cool off a little this weekend.
Hubby is driving OTR and making good money doing it but it means I am home alone with the girls 5 days a week usually. I know we are lucky as some OTR drivers are gone for weeks at a time. Hubby misses being home and being able to "help" me with the girls,etc.
Tonight was a rough night with the oldest GD again. Things haven't been too bad lately but tonight things got really bad. She was suppose to go to her dance class but since she refused to help pick up until the last minute, I refused to take her to the class. Needless to say, that made her that much madder but I stood my ground with her and she stayed home. I also sent BOTH girls ( 7 yr ol & 16 mo old) to bed a little before 8pm.
IDK but I feel like crying. I feel so alone and just exhausted with life. I am certain my health also ties into all of this as well. When you have troubles walking, you don't want to go a lot of places or do a lot of things at times so you end up sitting home looking at the same 4 walls all the time.
Hubby will be home sometime tomorrow for part of the weekend.Hopefully, things will be kind of quiet and relaxing for all of us.
Right now, I just feel like I want to be held and told everything will be all right. I guess my late husband's birthday this week plus raising the girls kind of on my own maybe brings back memories of when I was a widow with young kids and that is what is bumming me out.
Thankfully tomorrow is Friday and a 3 day weekend for me! Maybe I can get somethings done and feel better about life once more.
Oldest GD turned 7 yrs old on Tuesday. We are keeping very busy and have something going on every night. I might have over booked us. *sigh*
Yesterday would have been my late husband's 59th birthday, had he of lived. He died when he was 40, just short of his 41st bday leaving me to raise our 4.5 yr old daughter and 3.5 yr old son. For my sake, I did remarry but things haven't worked out between my son and new husband. I can't say much as things between his oldest daughter and myself aren't great either.
The weather is in a state of flux....hot, humid, brief rain showers, etc and suppose to cool off a little this weekend.
Hubby is driving OTR and making good money doing it but it means I am home alone with the girls 5 days a week usually. I know we are lucky as some OTR drivers are gone for weeks at a time. Hubby misses being home and being able to "help" me with the girls,etc.
Tonight was a rough night with the oldest GD again. Things haven't been too bad lately but tonight things got really bad. She was suppose to go to her dance class but since she refused to help pick up until the last minute, I refused to take her to the class. Needless to say, that made her that much madder but I stood my ground with her and she stayed home. I also sent BOTH girls ( 7 yr ol & 16 mo old) to bed a little before 8pm.
IDK but I feel like crying. I feel so alone and just exhausted with life. I am certain my health also ties into all of this as well. When you have troubles walking, you don't want to go a lot of places or do a lot of things at times so you end up sitting home looking at the same 4 walls all the time.
Hubby will be home sometime tomorrow for part of the weekend.Hopefully, things will be kind of quiet and relaxing for all of us.
Right now, I just feel like I want to be held and told everything will be all right. I guess my late husband's birthday this week plus raising the girls kind of on my own maybe brings back memories of when I was a widow with young kids and that is what is bumming me out.
Thankfully tomorrow is Friday and a 3 day weekend for me! Maybe I can get somethings done and feel better about life once more.
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