Feeling bad today.

I've been selling things on ebay. I can do it from home, and I thought it would be less stressful and that I would be more able to relax. You see, stress has become intolerable to me. The last job that I had was terrible. I could do he wok well, but dealing with the manager taxed me in ways that I found hard to deal with. I am unable to cope with the stress of dealing with difficult people anymore. It sometimes takes me days to process issues, and only after I stop shaking can I search for resolution. I thought that working from home would be easier on my nerves, but there are days when that is not so. I had a customer complain that the damage during shipping was my fault for not packing it well enough, and claimed that the postal worker denied the insurance claim because I didn't use the proper type of bubble wrap. When my postal worker was asked about it, she said that the claim should not have been denied, especially because of the packing job. She asked that the package be sent back to her and she would process the insurance and get us the money back.  I'm really upset about it, and out of the hundreds of items sold, I've had 3 people complain to me. I'm really careful about packing, but sometimes it is not enough. I feel guilt because the package didn't arrive safely, and I am hurt that they assume that it is my fault, because I didn't use the correct type of bubble wrap.  Point is, I feel bad. I am sitting her, by myself, feeling bad. I can't really do anything constructive, because I feel so bad, and this is not good. I have alot of things I could be doing, but I am doing none of them because I feel bad.  My grandaughter was in a talent show last night. She did a dance/gymnastic routine which gained her a rousing round of applause. My daughter sent her flowers, and she was very happy, for the most part, for the evening. But she treated me badly in public. She was embarrassed that I was even there. She stayed away from me all evening, and said things like "I don't have to be with you" when I asked her to pose for a picture. She's in trouble at the school and they are putting pressure on her that she can't stand. There is always an adult with her, and the stress of that is getting to her. She's taking it out on me. I've worked really hard to get her adjusted, but she is fighting it. She's been here for 1 1/4 years now, and only just stopped talking about her foster family as if they were her whole life. There are dozens of bad habits she's picked up, between her mother and her former foster family, that I have to break her of if she expects to fit in with other humans, and it's been tough going. Although we've made significant progress, there are still issues she clings to. I don't like living in Maine. Especially not in this promidently Baptist town, because I am not a Baptist. I don't fit in here, either. I want to move south, back near home and my family, but I stay here because of my brother. I brought him up here with me and he loves it. He wants to stay here for the rest of his life, but he wouldn't be able to manage up here alone.  After the adoption went through, last August, I thought that I would be free of state involvement, but they are still there. The school has insisted on a psychiatric evaluation of the girl, and the counselor she was seeing wouldn't give one, and was arrogant and uncooperative in the extreme, so she's no longer in the picture. I'm afraid that they are going to insist on a "case manager" from the state taking over her "care", and forcing me to do things which I feel are either unnecessary or counter productive in order to get her to "adjust" to her new life, which will actually be more harmful. What I want to do is leave. Start over.