Feeling alone

Ive suffered from minor depression when I was in middle school but it slowly increased as I got to high school. I enjoyed freshman year but then after I decided to go to another high school because the previous one is known to be a really bad school and I also wanted to go there to help my friend who was feeling bullied. Now its about to be my senior year and my depression has deepened since I transferred my sophomore year.  I feel lonely like theres no one to talk to and although I have friends, they aren't there for me like i wish they were.. Im basically the outsider.. they go to each others houses and I'm just there at home alone since mom works a lot. when we get back to school, i hear about them doing this and that and i just wonder to myself "why wasn't i invited, I'm not the new girl anymore". i always stay home alone and I'm so used to  it that i reject some people who actually ask me to hang out, like my family. Now  friends i reject (idk if u can call them friends) ask me to and i do hang out with them, and i think they're there for me but honestly they just use me or the guys eventually want to "hit at me". it just gets frustrating..  My mother goes out and has fun. actually right now she's off on vacation while my sis comes and watches me till she gets back and all she says is that "i can't find your friends for you". which is true but i haven't had much luck. I also feel kind of useless and pathetic my friends all have jobs and are part of something in high school.. my parents don't let me work and i never had the support to go and play sports or other extracurricular activities since i never had a ride and my school is far from my house. It seems like everything falls on top of the other, including my bf who's mother doesn't like me and forces us to break up every time she finds out were dating in secret. He was the main person who actually did talk to me and cared and i say did because of his mother making us break up again.. All this adds to my depression and now i see myself eating once a day.. I guess i just want someone to talk to sometimes to help me get back on my feet and help me on my way to college. 

Replies

RichardRyder88
RichardRyder88

What have you tried to make yourself feel better when you feel down? Good habits or bad, everyone has SOMETHING they go to when they feel alone, sad, lonely etc. If you don\'t, that would be a good thing to develop pre- college.
janjan258
janjan258

I don\'t really have anything yet, but i am hoping to maybe do volunteer work maybe deal with animals to get me distracted
RichardRyder88
RichardRyder88

That\'s a start, but there are things you could do now that could help. Do you: meditate, sing, exercise, do art, write, study for pleasure, etc? All can help take the edge off.
janjan258
janjan258

I do exercise or dance every morning but sometimes after I\'m done the feelings just tend to return.
RichardRyder88
RichardRyder88

We should discuss some options you could try. Check your messages.