Slipped....but didn't go back. I guess that's something to feel ok about. Just read about Charmed who tried to take her own life. NOTHING is worth that. My heart goes out to her.
Aw Bernie, I more than understand how you said you hate to post because everyone is so positive about their recovery and you feel it will bring them down. I too slipped, again! I get 30 + days in and then I blow it! My credit cards are completely maxed out and I am so far behind, there is no catching up. I feel like such a complete loser most of the time. I know that this is an addiction, but I can not get beyond what it has done to my family. I too have felt so lost, alone and worthless that it has entered my mind so many times that I should just end it. So far I have not given in to that.
Please do not beat yourself up. I too have not gone back to what it was, it is just slips, but slips none the less. We just have to be grateful for the days we do have in, and just keep on trying. I am not giving up, I will keep on trying, please hang in there with me as well!!
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Aw Bernie, I more than understand how you said you hate to post because everyone is so positive about their recovery and you feel it will bring them down. I too slipped, again! I get 30 + days in and then I blow it! My credit cards are completely maxed out and I am so far behind, there is no catching up. I feel like such a complete loser most of the time. I know that this is an addiction, but I can not get beyond what it has done to my family. I too have felt so lost, alone and worthless that it has entered my mind so many times that I should just end it. So far I have not given in to that.
Please do not beat yourself up. I too have not gone back to what it was, it is just slips, but slips none the less. We just have to be grateful for the days we do have in, and just keep on trying. I am not giving up, I will keep on trying, please hang in there with me as well!!