Fanfic Reflections and Real Life Lessons

i read fan fiction, rather a lot of it truth be told. probably more than is healthy and i can admit i'm a bit obsessed. i realised a few years back that fan fiction can be liberating - can release your imagination to fly on thoughts of what could've been in the canon works, or re-envision what characters' motivations may be. mostly it's just entertainment, but once in awhile there'll be a piece so profound, so insightful that it's not the characters i get caught up in, but what the words and actions enable in the characters.
i'm reading a piece like that right now - one that the author says is her best hope for what a particular character could be. the piece was written long before the end of the canon book series was finished, so she had the opportunity to really fly free with a "could be" scenario. i'm so touched by the changes this character is making to and for himself and the struggle he endures to become a better person. it's something i identify with at this moment and it's bittersweet to know he'll have a resolution that i cannot truly reach - a happy ending that can't translate completely to real life.
there are lessons to be taken from his struggles though, ones that make me hopeful for taking steps toward the best hope for what i can be someday. lessons that self-reflection is hard work, and painful but worthwhile; that grief and loss are not insurmountable conditions, that choice and action bring us closer to ourselves.
my heart hurts, these are heavy hopes and thoughts to bear, to consider. i wrote to thank the author - even though it's hard to read and hard to hope for myself, it's a reminder that i can and should hope for myself and that i can and should take steps (even small ones) toward who i want to be and become.