Exploring ME..
Why do I keep allowing my ex back in my life?
1. I want my kids to have a "normal" family. My dad was not a part of my life and I had a step dad. It was not a good experience.
2. I have abandonment issues. I havnt seen my father since I was 8. My biggest fear in relationships is to be left by someone I love. I have a hard time trusting that people will always be there for me.
3. My mom was/is abused. I grew up watching my mom get beat by my dad, my stepdad, and her recent ex-bf and she always took it and never broke it off with them. She just let them use her til they were done and they left her. So when BD does/says awful things to me, I always think I dont have it so bad cuz at least he doesnt beat me.
4. I have low self esteem. I'm not ugly and I get a lot of attention from men, but being in this marriage has cost me my self-worth. Always being made to feel like I'm a nobody, I'm not good enough for anyone, I dont deserve anything good to happen to me, etc. After a few years of verbal, emotional, and financial abuse, I've begun to believe all those things are true.
5. I have no confidence. I feel like I will never find anyone better. I am afraid to take my clothes off in front of anyone but my BD because after having two kids I have a messed up tummy area.
6. I'm afraid I will never find love again and if I let go of my love for my BD, I will be alone forever and never feel in love again.
1. I want my kids to have a "normal" family. My dad was not a part of my life and I had a step dad. It was not a good experience.
2. I have abandonment issues. I havnt seen my father since I was 8. My biggest fear in relationships is to be left by someone I love. I have a hard time trusting that people will always be there for me.
3. My mom was/is abused. I grew up watching my mom get beat by my dad, my stepdad, and her recent ex-bf and she always took it and never broke it off with them. She just let them use her til they were done and they left her. So when BD does/says awful things to me, I always think I dont have it so bad cuz at least he doesnt beat me.
4. I have low self esteem. I'm not ugly and I get a lot of attention from men, but being in this marriage has cost me my self-worth. Always being made to feel like I'm a nobody, I'm not good enough for anyone, I dont deserve anything good to happen to me, etc. After a few years of verbal, emotional, and financial abuse, I've begun to believe all those things are true.
5. I have no confidence. I feel like I will never find anyone better. I am afraid to take my clothes off in front of anyone but my BD because after having two kids I have a messed up tummy area.
6. I'm afraid I will never find love again and if I let go of my love for my BD, I will be alone forever and never feel in love again.
Replies
Look in the mirror and say to yourself, \"I AM beautiful. I deserve so much better. I dont need someone that treats me that way.\"
Keep telling yourself that until you believe it. No man is worth all the pain that he puts you through. You are so young, don\'t settle for someone that makes you feel worthless.
YOU ARE SOMEBODY! Hold your head up. You deserve so much better. Believe in yourself. ((((HUGS)))))
Yes yes. Use \"I am\" statements, not \"I am not\" And use them to state beautiful things about yourself.
Abusers do that, they work at causing us chaos, and pain, and making us feel less than who we are, for the purpose of gaining power and control.
Always remember that God lives within you, as you. And because of that, you are perfect...at your center. Anyone who tells you different it....well a lot of things, but at this point I will just say, they are wrong.....
big hugs..
Thanks!!! That is a great idea for me to work on! :)