Everything and nothing

   I'm so fucking numb I can't even stand it. My doctor hasn't called me back yet. I need my medication or I am going to fucking loose it.
   All I want to do right now is cut. Cut, cut, cut. Slice my flesh into peices and watch the blood pour out. Red on white. I want it to feel good. But I don't need it. Not yet, at least.
   The cast list comes out tomorrow. I'm hoping for 'Mina'!
   Maybe going to school will make me feel better. Being around Cass and Cait. And have I mentioned Anthony? He's this adorable little freshman kid. I think we're gunna be friends :p
   But for now I'm trying to think of ways to pass the time...
   I put a rubber band on my wrist. For just in case.. I don't want it, but it's what I have to do to keep me from cutting. I'll do anything to avoid a relapse.
   I wanna talk to you all night.
   Sorry, this is just a list of random thoughts now, haha. I might go draw or something. Since I can't sleep I have to keep myself busy somehow.