Ever since I was ten
When that teacher publicly humiliated me, by tossing my desk over to the entire class, making me a messy example, had me running away from school at the age of ten, out of pure utter embarassment. And shame. I was young, we were all about to hit puberty. What if I had pads, and had problems kept away from the students, in there, to protect the religion I was secretly studying even at the age of ten. I was reading everything in the world I could find about healing. When I got locked in the mental institution at seventeen years old, I triped over a lit candle when playing the Ouja board with two other younger kids just to spooke em out, really hit me with bad Karma for the rest of my life I suffered.
I watched the corn grow in an open field and watched it turn a beautiful yellow color. I didin't speak for one solid year. I shut down. I completely did not utter a word, unless it was to my father, or out of ridicule to someone else for purpousfuly trying to attack me and hurt me.
I grew up with human animals who had no sence of intelligent or survival skills. It was there at age seventeen when I lost my entire childhoold, and began to fight.
I fought each one of them off of me as hard and fast as I could. The sexual assults, the touching the secrets of the staff that hired hated us made fun of us, made us react to things by suggestion and giving others privladges denied to those who were ostrasiged if they didn't put out to them. .. THat was the world I grew up in. When you experienced that for yourself, then you can judge me. Tilll then I need happiness peace, and love just like everyone else. And to stay happpy. I lost my best friend in the sytem I will never forget. For Cheryl A. Auletta, may she find the peace in death I tried so hard with all my might to give her happiness in life. For thos who suffer with depression and have noted this mont is national depression month, for him. For all those diagnosed, and undiagnosed, who suffer with depression for no reason at all. May this world be a better place for the future. Blessed be. Heidi
I watched the corn grow in an open field and watched it turn a beautiful yellow color. I didin't speak for one solid year. I shut down. I completely did not utter a word, unless it was to my father, or out of ridicule to someone else for purpousfuly trying to attack me and hurt me.
I grew up with human animals who had no sence of intelligent or survival skills. It was there at age seventeen when I lost my entire childhoold, and began to fight.
I fought each one of them off of me as hard and fast as I could. The sexual assults, the touching the secrets of the staff that hired hated us made fun of us, made us react to things by suggestion and giving others privladges denied to those who were ostrasiged if they didn't put out to them. .. THat was the world I grew up in. When you experienced that for yourself, then you can judge me. Tilll then I need happiness peace, and love just like everyone else. And to stay happpy. I lost my best friend in the sytem I will never forget. For Cheryl A. Auletta, may she find the peace in death I tried so hard with all my might to give her happiness in life. For thos who suffer with depression and have noted this mont is national depression month, for him. For all those diagnosed, and undiagnosed, who suffer with depression for no reason at all. May this world be a better place for the future. Blessed be. Heidi
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