Entry 1....

Okkkkkk.... today i have realised that judgements on how a person appears over powers a persons personality and heart!. CHURCH i walk into a place of worship, the house of GOD first thing, eyes staring at me. YES I AM THIN, YES MAYBE ALMOST MOST DEFFINATLEY I AM DISGUSTING, all these thoughts have been circling all day!! CHURCH a place for the community to come together, not even in this place of worship did i recieve kind words or even a hello. All that was noticed was my ED!!!! maybe if someone had chosen to come and speak to me like i am a person then maybe just MAYBE someone may have realised that i am TRYING to love myself for i am, TRYING to ignore the thoughts and voices of needing to be thin, TRYING to be myself and not what i think everyone wants me to be!!!! 
THIS WORLD IS SO JUDGEMENTAL, MAYBE PEOPLE SHOULD THINK. WHAT ARE MY JUDGEMENTS DOING TO OTHER PEOPLE?
Someday i will be perfect!!!!