entry number 2:
Not sharing expenses or major decisions concerning finances.
Again, too many to write here, but here is one. When our kids were younger, they had to go to daycare (obviously). Daycare for three kids, two who were still toddlers, was beyond what I even made in a week. He refused to help me pay for it--they were my kids, I made the decision to have them, I could figure it out (the two youngest are his, by the way). I was forced to go to Social Services and apply for daycare assistance in order to continue working. I still had to come up with about $300 a month for the three kids, but what a world of difference that help made!! He still refused to pay for ANYTHING for the kids--he paid half the rent and the electric bill, everything else was my responsibility even though he made more than I did and the kids had many expenses. About a year into this, my case worker informed me that they could no longer help me unless I was willing to put him on child support. I told him and he screamed at me that I was a liar and he wasn't paying child support, etc. They couldn't make him pay, he said, because he was already paying for one child. Lo and behold, he was served with papers to come to court to pay child support. I thought he was going to literally kill me when he got those papers!! He was so angry with me for being such a conniving bitch. Well, I ended up cancelling my child care assistance to drop the child support case and he still refused to help me! I ended up having to work out a deal with the babysitter to make payments to her (in fact, the kids had been out of daycare for years and I was still paying her!)
Again, too many to write here, but here is one. When our kids were younger, they had to go to daycare (obviously). Daycare for three kids, two who were still toddlers, was beyond what I even made in a week. He refused to help me pay for it--they were my kids, I made the decision to have them, I could figure it out (the two youngest are his, by the way). I was forced to go to Social Services and apply for daycare assistance in order to continue working. I still had to come up with about $300 a month for the three kids, but what a world of difference that help made!! He still refused to pay for ANYTHING for the kids--he paid half the rent and the electric bill, everything else was my responsibility even though he made more than I did and the kids had many expenses. About a year into this, my case worker informed me that they could no longer help me unless I was willing to put him on child support. I told him and he screamed at me that I was a liar and he wasn't paying child support, etc. They couldn't make him pay, he said, because he was already paying for one child. Lo and behold, he was served with papers to come to court to pay child support. I thought he was going to literally kill me when he got those papers!! He was so angry with me for being such a conniving bitch. Well, I ended up cancelling my child care assistance to drop the child support case and he still refused to help me! I ended up having to work out a deal with the babysitter to make payments to her (in fact, the kids had been out of daycare for years and I was still paying her!)
Replies