End of my life as I know it now
i hate this site. Can't even find my journal or is this it. In 2 1/2 years I've lost my life. My husband 10/3/14 then my oldest daughter 3/27/16 now my only son 3/16/17 not a full year since my daughters death. Now not only do I have copd but I can add breast cancer that can't be cured, basically a death sentence. I have custody of my 8 year old granddaughter and her 2 older sisters live with me. My second daughter turned to drugs so it is her kids I have. I believe in God. I pray. I'm a good decent person. Why is this all happening to me. I ask God why but he hasn't answered. My 21 year old granddaughter told me the morning I was going to the Doc for my cancer biopsy, I prayered for you Grammy that the test would be negative. I hugged her and thanked her. Then we got the result. She said God didn't answer my prayer. I told her sometimes God says "No" I feel like everything in my life has fallen apart. I'm falling apart. My family is falling apart. Any prayers may help or maybe not. If it wasn't for these girls I worship and adore I would end it all. I am so distraught. I'm afraid of what is to come.
Im sorry for complaining and I hope everyone here is having an easier time then I am in their lives.
I also found you never run out of tears, never.
Replies
It's been such a long time since I saw anything by you I thought you had given up on DS completely.
Last time I knew anything you were struggling with your husband and daughters loss. Now the loss of your son and your own diagnosis is truly devastating. You are such a strong and brave lady. I wish I knew what to say. I wish I could promise you a miracle. I can only say that I will pray and I hope some how the prayers for health, peace and comfort will be heard and answered.
Thank you so much. I just worry about my girls (g/daughters) I appreciate your prayers. Hope you are doing well. Linda
My heart goes out to you. May the love of and for your Granddaughters give you strength to get through all the pain and heartache you have and still are dealing with. I will keep you in my thoughts and please know that there are people here you can talk to if you just need someone to listen.
I am so truly sorry to hear of all the pain that you've been through in the past several years. My heart breaks for you. The most I could do is send my best wishes and prayers to you and hope a miracle occurs and somehow turns your life around towards a more positive direction. You have been through it all lady, you are such a strong person and I sincerely admire that. I know that it doesn't feel like that at times but from those of us on the outside looking in....you truly have the strength of a giant!
Godspeed to you my dear....
Biggest hugs ever...
Darcie
Dear Linda, I'm so sorry your enduring so much loss, and enduring your own devastation of cancer. I pray that if there were to be a miracle that you would be it. Your such a caring loving woman, and your grandbabies will surely need you!!! I also pray for peace, and help for you with your grand kids, and yourself. Ive had two cancer scares, and it was very worrisome. I am grateful for your transparency of telling us what is going on with you, and your health. I'll be praying hard for you today. Much love and gentle hugs, carla
Well Carla unfortunately I'm in stage four cancer and there is no cure for me. I have begun harm in therapy but they doubt that will help and want to try to shrink the tumor in my breast but it has spread to my lymph nodes. I appreciate the prayers and the thoughts Thank you for being my friend. Linda
Harmony therapy. Sorry for the typo.