Emotional vs. Intellectual Thinking
Thursday, July 10, 2008 – 10:35 A.M. Sleep did not come easily last night, but when it finally arrived, it was a relief from the pain and annoyances of the week. My life has not been going as smoothly as I would like. It is not really anyone’s fault, but just the way of life. There are times when I am overly sensitive to what people say to me. Tuesday afternoon was a case in point. After I had finished getting my physical therapy, my therapist (Chris) asked if I could come in earlier today. I had been scheduled for a time late in the afternoon. She explained that she needed to work with me for at least an hour, and the time I was due to go there would not permit that. I did not have a big problem changing times (except arranging for a time change with my ride), so I fully understood why she wanted me there at a different time. I just wish she had left it at that, and not said any more. Chris then said that she wanted me there earlier because it took additional people to get me out of my wheelchair and onto the traction table, and it took her twenty minutes to get me positioned properly on the table before she could actually start working with me. Going there late in the day would not permit that. By the time she finished her whole explanation, I felt as though I was being a burden on all of them. My mood, which was already down, really took a nosedive. I have been struggling with what had been said ever since then. Emotionally, I feel hurt by what had been said. Intellectually, I do not think Chris meant anything unkind by her remark. There are times when my mind interprets things that are said to me in unusual and unintentional ways. I am sure this is one of them. Until now, I have had a good relationship with Chris. I know that in order to continue making progress with my therapy, I must somehow manage to get past the hurt that my mind feels. I need to work something out within myself before this afternoon’s session. It will not be easy, but I am determined to do it. Quotes for Success: “Success is the study of the Obvious. Everyone should take Obvious 1 and Obvious 2 in school.” Jim Rohn
Replies
I am sure she meant no harm, but I can certianly see how that would be hurtful to hear, I wish I could say something helpful about how to get through this, Maybe time will heal
She just wanted to make sure you understood why she wanted you there earlier. These people are being PAID. by your insurance to give you the care you need, you are not a burden to ANYONE and you shouldn\'t feel the lest bit guilty about it, many hugs-Stephanie
Hmmmm... not sure how I feel about what she said. I don\'t think she meant it to be any kind of hurtful thing or criticism, but I think it was something left best unsaid. Or, said differently.
The level of your CP IS complicated. Maybe she was just thinking out loud too, trying to plan best for future sessions and making sure every detail was covered. Now I\'m thinking it might be better that she said something rather than just assume it would be known. She\'s making sure you get the RIGHT therapy. That\'s a good thing.
Or maybe she just has brain fog and needs things out loud like the rest of us to help it stick...???
Hugs and Mojo to you...
Weebs xoxoxoxoxo
Thanks for all the comments. From a physical point of view, my session did not go very well today. I was having more pain than usual, and even my medicine had less effect that it normally does. She tried giving me moist heat therapy (for the first time), but that did not help much either.
Although we did not talk specifically about what Chris said on Tuesday, in scheduling additional appointments for me, she said that because she is often the last therapist to leave the clinic, she needed at least one other person to help her with me. That made more sense because when I am at home, I have two people to get me in or out of my wheelchair almost all the time.
I am seeing my doctor tomorrow (Friday) morning. Chris wrote a progress report for me to give to him. I was nosy and read it after getting home. That was a bad mistake. I agreed with most of what she had written, but then came to a part where she seems to be making a diagnosis different from the one made by my doctor. I looked it up on the Internet, and unless I read everything incorrectly, the treatment requires serious surgery.
I plan on telling my doctor that I really need for them to come to just one diagnosis, so that I will not be driven crazy with worry every time I hear something new mentioned.