Eleventh

The voices aren't really fair. I feel like I am trapped in something I picked myself up from and left. Being alone doesn't help. Maybe this is the lesson. But you can't just attach yourself to someone and call it good. Just because you can't be alone. At least this is the perspective i have built for myself. There could be something unhealthy about it. I guess this is what counslers are for. I have questions, like am I actually talking to another human this way. How cowardly. Terrrible. And why did I develop it so late. Like now I'm mature enough to have it or something. Unreal. This is scientifically impossible and yet here I am able to hear this loud and clear. Unfair. I didn't want this. 

I'll just have to pray to the right people to come into my life. And continue going to counseling. Sometimes I can be possitive. I just don't feel Like it right now. This is so unfair.