Easter

When I was a kid, my mother had Easter dinner for the grandparents and great uncle/aunts. Surrounded by these people, who were then about the age I am now, was difficult because we had to "behave properly" all the time. For me that meant that I sat with my ankles crossed and my hands folded in my lap.
I got used to the inactivity during my childhood, because this was the posture that my mother insisted that I maintain while in her presence. After becoming an adult (totally unprepared for this adventure), I immediately got married, had children, and began working full time in an office job using a computer (basically chained to my desk).
I was never satisfied with my work, but there was a certain aspect to it that appealed. I had a talent for it and became very good at it. But happiness always has aluded me.
Now, I am out of work and out of money and my resources have nearly dried up. I don't know how I'm going to survive. I am irritated at everything and everybody.