E-mailing the new girl

i was a hardcore junkie for 4 years, i lost my job my girlfriend all my friends my morals my dignity the roof on my head and i said to myself whats the point in getting better now everything is lost and gone but for some reason i did do it and look now its not even a year yet its gonna be 11 months since i last used
look at me now applying to uni abroad, great job, the business is flourishing, good health, closer to god, my word means something again, i am beginning to make new friends trying to get a very very beautiful, highly intelligent and compassionate albeit a little prude girl to go out with me (the girl is you in case you didnt figure that one out :P)
things are really looking up for me touch wood. I have much to be grateful for indeed my life isnt perfect in fact its miserable absolutely terrible sometimes but its getting better i have a reason to wake up in the morning something to look forward to every day. I have excitement again joy again laughter again good days are coming i know it i can feel it they lie right ahead i just have a few more steps to tow this heavy load...



Haha haha ha
she shot you down like a little helpless birdie flying in an open sky
shnedy you fucking loser go crawl back into the filthy dark hole you came out of you little shit.
dont get over excited dont fucking get over excited and push too hard how many times have I told you?
How many times have I fucking told you not to push too hard?
I know the equation is incomplete you havent factored in all the variables but what about the ones you have hmmm??
what about them?
what about the blatant disregard you showed for the rules?
you knew clearly what the equation added up to yet you still chose to go against it
you happy now? you might have just lost the girl as a friend and a potential girlfriend.
shendy I dont hate you I am not the enemy here you need to realize that; the rules, the equations, the prohibitions they are all in place for a reason. You arnt normal buddy you need to accept that and work with it.
But it dont matter none for now
right now you have 2 hours to sleep and then a paper to give so tantagalush my warrior channel the spirits of old, call upon the elements to aid you and give them hell...
For Ashenvale for our fallen brethren and for what we now hope to build
Adun Toridas

Stop raping yourself in the ass. U need to be kind to yourself. U are handsome, smart, spiritual, loyal and a keeper

Try this. ( LIVE IN THE MOMENT) Dont beat yourself up for the past and believe me ik that is easier said then done. Thats my main problem ( aside from being an addict of course), it really is and probably always will be. City Chick is right tho your a great person the only thing id suggest is dont try to predict out comes so much or take to the feelings you may have for a girl too quickly. That way if it doesn\'t work out then fuck it, on to the next one. And also for me at least it seems when im less obsessive and in a kind of \" whatever go with the flow\" kind of demeanor the girls will pick up on that and then they will be the ones obsessing not you. Finally if you think your the only one whos not normal your wrong there is no such thing as normal, and If someone says they are then their probably the craziest mofo you\'ll ever meet lol... You got a lot positive attributes brother use em and dont be so hard on yourself when things do work out according to plan.

Last sentence i meant to write dont not do. You get the idea tho. And btw the only reason im even writing any of this is bc your my friend and you have and would do the same for me. For awhile the only thing i had in the beggining of my recovery was the emails we sent back n forth. And to be honest there where quite a few times that the advise you gave really had a controlling factor in me not relapsing.

This is a beautiful entry.