Dying inside

I want to fight for my marriage but how can you fight for something the other doesn't want. Husband paid the retainer fee for an attorney yesterday.  I just want to crawl in a hole and dye.  How can you throw away 22 years like it was nothing. He is desperately trying to find a replacement online it's almost comical. I fear by the end of this month it will all be over I don't think i will ever recover from this.....