Driving around .....

Hello, i felt so much in a daze earlier that I went for a drive. I thought it might help but it's not. I still feel so " alone" and miserable at this moment. I have honestly tried reaching out to both church, making new friends and as I was fearful I feel " rejected ". See I am used to being the problem solver for others and I have allowed myself to get to this point in my life. I don't know what is the " core reason" behind me being so messed up. My parents treated me well when I was a kid an in fact I put my entire family through a lot of emotional turmoil as I was classified as a child as " Emotionally Disturbed" and " perceptually impaired". I have had over 30 jobs in my life and the one I do now is the longest of 7+ years. I am supposed to go back to work this Monday and I am terrified as whole my hurt shoulder is a lot better I am an emotionally a wreck over the excessive debt that I have allowed to accumulate , it's so much that even consumer credit counseling cannot set up a Payment plan. I did get a call from a coworker tonight who invited me out later but then when I was checking in with him he said he's not sure.