Down in the Dumps!

Yet another day in the hospital! I'm bored as usuall! A person can only watch so much TV and surf so much net! I've been doing a lot of thinking about school too! I have to make a choice when I get back home! I can either re-enter my school and try once again to get my high school diploma or I can go for my GED! The problem is that I want my diploma SOOOOOOO bad words can't describe! But it's taking so long to get it and I still have like a good year left. With me being irresponsible at times and being sick it seems imposible to achieve it! I have been working towards my diploma for a good 2-2 1/2 years, after I dropped out, and haven't gotten very far! My principal is so supportive of me and knows how smart I am and what I'm capable of achieving! And yet he is getting frustrated, which he has every right, at how long it's taking, how much further I have, and how I'm in and out of school ALL the time! He keeps suggesting that I go for my GED! He says he knows it wouldn't be difficult for me to get and I would have it and be done with school in a short period of time! This seems like a no brainer, that I should/would choose my GED. But I really don't know if I can live the rest of my life saying I didn't graduate and get my diploma! Another problem is that lets say I do get my GED, will it be enough to be able to pass my SATs. I have every intension of going to college! I can get into a two year college with a GED but have to have decient SAT scores! Will I be able to do that with just the knowledge of a GED? I want more than anything to be able to graduate, have a gown and hat cerimony, a graduation party, and senior pics. But if I go with a GED a lot of that isn't possible. But on the other hand if I go for my diploma, at this rate I won't even graduate before my lil sis. I need to get out of my hometown very bad. With a GED I could do that soon, but with my diploma I'm stuck here for quite some time! But whos to say once I get to college I won't fail? I know thats a risk I have to take but I'm just worried I'm gonna end up back here. I wish with everything in me that I could stay in my town with my mom and family. But if I do so I won't have any opportunities to excell in life and will, more inmportantly, be stuck here with the bad influences and a friend that just won't except that I can't and shouldn't hang out with her anymore! The hard part is that I love her to death and we have a great time. But if I continue to hang out with her it won't be good for me in the long run! If I don't leave and start fresh with new faces, better people, and better environment, I could very well die a lot younger. It's really hard to explain but that's just how it is and I CAN'T change any of it. If I stay I will be miserable and if I leave I will have a chance in life! But to take a leap like that with no one I know and nothing familiar is soooooo scary! I just don't know what to do and need a sign or someone to tell me what to do!