Don't Ever Let Yourself Fall in Love
Don't Let Yourself Fall in Love
I'm finally starting to see the very faint light at the end of the tunnel. It has been a really hard 3 weeks, really upsetting, really angry, just really horrible basically.But I feel that is starting to change now, its coming up to the weekend.I'm sleeping over my gran's with my AMAZING cousins Simon and Pierre-Yves, I love them to bits! =DRight now, I'm just planning this in my uncle Robin's car on the way back to my gran's house from swimming with them.I cant remember the last time I felt this relaxed!There are some people who have helped prolong my horrible feelings though.Lizzie - she basically said yes to a guy for the prom, Chris, who doesn't even like her like I do. I love her, I changed myself a lot for her, religion, morals etc. She has been a bit of a bitch to me within the last few days, I thought we had moved past the arguments that I had with her, apparently she's not ready to move on. I respect that though. She is being a VERY triggering person, she never used to be!Chris - a horrible person who took my girl from me and sparked this degradation of my sanity. Some people say he is nice, I don't believe them for a second. He is VERY triggering when he's near Lizzie, he's as triggering as he can possibly be when he was hugging her.Andrew - he is incredibly annoying, never shuts up, he always tells me what Lizzie and Chris were doing, I hate it, cos it ALWAYS gets my jealous feelings up again, and when those feelings come up again, I want to get angry and hurt people, again. Quite triggering at times.But I would probably still be in a really depressed mood if it wasn't for a few people. Roseanna - she's the best mate of Lizzie, she has been surprisingly supportive of me, and has listened to me cry, bitch etc, with out judging me.Michael - he's been going through with me from the start, he has supported me a lot through this, and even though he does get a bit annoying, he doesn't really understand what i was/am going through.Kathryn - she has listened to me, provided me a shoulder to cry on and has a certain similarity with me. I'm not gonna go into that though. She's very understanding.Ed - he understands what I have gone through, as he had gone through it last year with all the plotting against someone who had taken his girl from him.I'm grateful to all of the people who helped meWell, that's my last few weeks for you, you can pass judgement if you want, but if you've never loved someone to the point that you would change everything about yourself, and had your heart broken by them, then you will never know the feeling, I really hope you never know the feeling ever!But for now, I'm optimistically looking to the future, yes it will be hard for me. Yes it will be hard to go through the support with Lizzie, but ill be stronger at the end. I have learnt 1 lesson the most clearly: DON'T EVER LET YOURSELF FALL IN LOVE!Peace in the south east, Rucka's Nuckas 4 Life! =D
(This was a blog post, by the way)
I'm finally starting to see the very faint light at the end of the tunnel. It has been a really hard 3 weeks, really upsetting, really angry, just really horrible basically.But I feel that is starting to change now, its coming up to the weekend.I'm sleeping over my gran's with my AMAZING cousins Simon and Pierre-Yves, I love them to bits! =DRight now, I'm just planning this in my uncle Robin's car on the way back to my gran's house from swimming with them.I cant remember the last time I felt this relaxed!There are some people who have helped prolong my horrible feelings though.Lizzie - she basically said yes to a guy for the prom, Chris, who doesn't even like her like I do. I love her, I changed myself a lot for her, religion, morals etc. She has been a bit of a bitch to me within the last few days, I thought we had moved past the arguments that I had with her, apparently she's not ready to move on. I respect that though. She is being a VERY triggering person, she never used to be!Chris - a horrible person who took my girl from me and sparked this degradation of my sanity. Some people say he is nice, I don't believe them for a second. He is VERY triggering when he's near Lizzie, he's as triggering as he can possibly be when he was hugging her.Andrew - he is incredibly annoying, never shuts up, he always tells me what Lizzie and Chris were doing, I hate it, cos it ALWAYS gets my jealous feelings up again, and when those feelings come up again, I want to get angry and hurt people, again. Quite triggering at times.But I would probably still be in a really depressed mood if it wasn't for a few people. Roseanna - she's the best mate of Lizzie, she has been surprisingly supportive of me, and has listened to me cry, bitch etc, with out judging me.Michael - he's been going through with me from the start, he has supported me a lot through this, and even though he does get a bit annoying, he doesn't really understand what i was/am going through.Kathryn - she has listened to me, provided me a shoulder to cry on and has a certain similarity with me. I'm not gonna go into that though. She's very understanding.Ed - he understands what I have gone through, as he had gone through it last year with all the plotting against someone who had taken his girl from him.I'm grateful to all of the people who helped meWell, that's my last few weeks for you, you can pass judgement if you want, but if you've never loved someone to the point that you would change everything about yourself, and had your heart broken by them, then you will never know the feeling, I really hope you never know the feeling ever!But for now, I'm optimistically looking to the future, yes it will be hard for me. Yes it will be hard to go through the support with Lizzie, but ill be stronger at the end. I have learnt 1 lesson the most clearly: DON'T EVER LET YOURSELF FALL IN LOVE!Peace in the south east, Rucka's Nuckas 4 Life! =D
(This was a blog post, by the way)
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