Dogs, AS, and Hair-Pulling

We are fostering two DOGS for a few WEEKS!!!!! Their owners are moving and have to live somewhere temporarily as they look for a house. They have already escaped once and gotten into out bathroom garbage a few times but that is making it even more fun. I love dog mischief. I've started sleeping downstairs because one of the dogs whines all night due to Seperation Anxiety. I am really enjoying hearing them bark in their sleep and watching them twitch their eyes, mouths, and legs as they dream dog dreams.

Happy (Late) Autism Awareness Day! My dad doesn't believe I have it and keeps telling me how I was so confident and brave when I was younger. I don't remember being like that. I got bullied for having friends who were boys. I would cry whenever my church class would sing me and my twin sister happy birthday. The two years I went to school, my twin sister got a B and I convinced myself the teacher mixed up our grades because she couldn't tell us apart. And the other year, I got a B+ and got really, really sad and angry at me and the teacher. I am really bad at speaking (because I am bad with my R's and I am not intellectually good with the spoken word.) I remember one time when I was at my family reunion and my grandma was walking around in sneakers. She turned one way with one foot but didn't do the same with the other foot. It bothers me even to this day. My family doesn't know about most of my struggles, though, because I am just now starting to verbally tell them because I am more self-aware due to learning about AS.

I was really excited to start writing but I am still as bad at telling stories as always. (That doesn't mean what it means in my head...)

There is this one girl at my church who compliments my hair whenever I'm not wearing a hat. She doesn't know that I wear hats because I cannot stop pulling out my hair. I love her intentions but she doesn't know how it's making me more self-conscious which makes me pull out my hair more. One time, when I got back from church after she complimented my hair, I was changing in my room and I started stimming and it grew into me silently screaming at her in my head explaining my Trichotillomania. It's a shame I can't explain it to her in person.

I might write a short letter explaining my AS and Trichotillomania and have my sister (who is the youth leader of our group) read it out loud for the class so they better understand, but I don't want to seem rude and selfish and attention-seeking. If I ever get to writing the letter, I might post it here for feedback.