DO YOU WONDER?? I KNOW YOU DO
KENNY'S BIRTHDAY JUST PASSED AND THANKS FOR THE WELL WISHES..SURE MISS THAT SON OF MINE...AS I READ EVERYONES WISHES FOR KEN, I WAS GREATFUL FOR THE FRIENDS ON HERE...NO ONE SAID ANYTHING HERE...I KNOW MY SONS REMEMBERED, BUT THINK IT IS SOMETIMES TOO HARD ON THEM...AS I WAS READING MY MIND STARTED THINKING AGAIN..DO YOU EVER WONDER WHY...AND I KNOW WE DO..IN THE BEGINNING IT IS EVERY MINUTE TRYING TO FIGURE OUT THE WHY..THEN AS TIME PASSES...WE START TO REALIZE THE WHY'S WILL NEVER BE ANSWERED...I AM TALKING ABOUT HOW THE WHY'S ARE REALLY THE I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND...YOU SEE MY SON, YOUR SON, YOUR DAUGHTER, YOUR CHILD WERE ALL SMART PEOPLE WHO COULD CHANGE THE WORLD..THEY HAD GREAT IDEALS, GREAT THOUGHTS, COULD ACCOMPLISH MANY THINGS...AND THEN CAME THAT DAY OR NIGHT THEY ARE NO LONGER A PART OF THIS WORLD...ALL THEY WERE OR WERE TO BECOME IS GONE...NOW THE WHYS FOR ME OR HAVE ALWAYS SEEMED SO SENSELESS...TAKE A YOUNG PERSON WITH SO MUCH ABILITY TO OFFER AND THEIR NO LONGER HERE. THAT IS WHAT I THINK THE WHY'S ARE ABOUT...DO I CONTINUE TO WONDER THE WHY'S YES...AT TIMES..MOSTLY NOW I JUST PLAIN MISS MY SON...I SOMETIMES WONDER HOW CAN THESE HOURS, DAYS, MONTHS, YEARS HAVE PASSED THAT I HAVE NOT SAID HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY WONDERFUL SWEET CHILD..IN WHAT SEEMS NOW LIKE FOREVER...AND YET THERE WILL PROBABLY BE MORE BIRTHDAY'S TO COME...BUT WHEN I THINK OF KEN'S ABILITIES..AND TO DIE...FOR WHAT...I DON'T KNOW...I KNOW WE ARE SUPPOSE TO GROW OLD AND LET NATURE TAKE ITS COURSE...MY WHYS NOW SEEM TO BE I QUESTION WHY ME NOT THAT I AM ANY BETTER THAN ANY OTHER MOM..I JUST WONDER...OUR AREA A MOM HAD A WRECK..THREE OF HER CHILDREN WERE EJECTED FROM THE CAR..THREE SWEET LITTLE CHILDREN...MOM LIVED..ONE CHILD THE LAST I HEARD..OH HOW SAD LIFE CAN BE..IT'S NOT JUST US IN THIS GROUP AS WE HAVE LEARNED AS NEW MEMBERS JOIN US..AND MANY MOM'S WHO NEVER FIND OUR GROUP...MY HEART ACHES EACH TIME I HEAR THE NEWS...IT SO MANY YOUNGER PEOPLE GETTING SHOT, KILLED, DYING SOMEWAY...AND THE CIRCLE CONTINUES DOESN'T IT...WE ARE NOT ALONE...YET WE ARE...WE FEEL SAD FOR OUR NEWER MEMBERS...BUT WE FEEL SORRY FOR US TOO AND THATS OKAY...WE WISH...BUT OUR WISHES TOO HURT...SOMEDAY WE THINK, SOMEDAY i AM JUST RAMBLING TONIGHT ...I AM SAD JUST VERY VERY SAD...FOR YOU ME ...ALL OF US...I LOVE YOU KENNY, MISS YOU...AND KNOW YOUR LOVING HEAVEN...FOREVER YOUR MOM
Replies
Yes, it\'s hard to live in this world, when our wishes, our plans, are not considered. G-d alone knows why things happen the way that they do. We have to accept, and continue to love those who remain.
Those of us who are lucky enough to age, face other challenges. Loss is always part of aging. The pain that, surprizingly, doesn\'t kill us. We must live with our broken hearts. There really is not another choice. I am sorry for all of us. Sorry for the loss of Kenny and my Jake. Love, abby
WE are the walking dead. We just have to keep trying to live and in some way honor our children. I feel a very strong desire to make my girls proud that I am continuing to live a simple life. That\'s all I need now. I wish you some peace. Hugs, Kathy
Yes, the world is a better place because of our children and the longing and missing will always be woven into the fabric of our lives. For me, it\'s learning how to take other colored threads to weave in and around and through the one that represents my son.
Loving care as you remember and MISS your Kenny. Thank goodness we have sisters of the heart who understand and care deeply.
XO Joanie
I hear you Sandi. The whys are not to be answered in this life. It sure sucks. Our kids had so much potential. It is just not right. At my age, the losses keep coming. But nothing compares to losing Lisa.
It is so sad that those close to us don\'t talk about our kids. I think they are afraid of hurting us. They don\'t want to see us sad. So we are here for one another.
Take care and enjoy that beautiful new home away from home.
Love and tight hugs, M
The whys and the what if\'s. They would beat me up if words could they are the ring leaders. I have a friend who lost her brother, she knew I was in this group I gave her a card and said when your Mom is ready give this to her. Her mom has found the bottle instead, Terrelle and I talk since I feel the presents of my son near her desk she wonders why I keep telling her Mike is bringing her brother by for a visit we smile and go back to work.
We are blessed to have one another to lean on.
Hugs Penny