Do Not Read if Squeamish
Just writing this as a way to calm my nerves a bit.
Saturday night my boyfriend and I were on the L train to go to one of our favorite gay bars. We were pulling into the sixth avenue station in Manhattan when we felt a bump followed by an awkward stop. The doors staid shut, but we smelt something burning. Just then other passengers started noticing the specks of blood on the platform outside the windows. After that, passengers from other cars began filtering back telling us that there was a body.
Turns out the burning smell was body parts that had been singed on the track. They finally let us off the train and there, only a few feet away was the now severed head of a man wedged between the train and platform. I don't think I will ever be able to get the contorted and agonized expression from his lifeless face out of my mind.
When we were exiting the car, my poor boyfriend made the mistake of looking down to find his footing. When he looked down the gap between the car and platform, he unfortunately saw the disemboweled entrails of the man.
Sorry to be so graphic, but I just need to write this down. We left when the paramedics arrived and announced the DOA. We couldn't even conceive still going out, and returned home, thoroughly traumatized. Luckily my brother and his girlfriend are a firefighter and EMT respectively and have good exercises to cope with such things having seen similar things themselves.
I had hoped I could go my entire life without having to witness something so horrible.
Saturday night my boyfriend and I were on the L train to go to one of our favorite gay bars. We were pulling into the sixth avenue station in Manhattan when we felt a bump followed by an awkward stop. The doors staid shut, but we smelt something burning. Just then other passengers started noticing the specks of blood on the platform outside the windows. After that, passengers from other cars began filtering back telling us that there was a body.
Turns out the burning smell was body parts that had been singed on the track. They finally let us off the train and there, only a few feet away was the now severed head of a man wedged between the train and platform. I don't think I will ever be able to get the contorted and agonized expression from his lifeless face out of my mind.
When we were exiting the car, my poor boyfriend made the mistake of looking down to find his footing. When he looked down the gap between the car and platform, he unfortunately saw the disemboweled entrails of the man.
Sorry to be so graphic, but I just need to write this down. We left when the paramedics arrived and announced the DOA. We couldn't even conceive still going out, and returned home, thoroughly traumatized. Luckily my brother and his girlfriend are a firefighter and EMT respectively and have good exercises to cope with such things having seen similar things themselves.
I had hoped I could go my entire life without having to witness something so horrible.
Replies
That is scary as hell. When I read your lastest journal entry, I thought you were going to say you say the guy that was eating another\'s guys face, but this is bad enough. Thanks for accepting my friend request. You boys have fun.
Wow Joe,
That is a horrible experience. I am sure that having a firefighter and an EMT as
a support system, they can give you some hints as to how to handle that image. I have a brother-in-law that is an EMT and a friend that is a Fire-fighter and have often heard their tales of horror. The positive aspect of that is that they are also given some training in ways to handle those types of scenes. While I know that there really is nothing that can prepare you for that first time, having someone there who understands the trauma is a life-saver.
Writing and journaling is a great way to help get those images out of your mind and outside of your body. I have often used journaling to get thoughts and ideas out of my head and on paper to give me the opportunity to see it in a different perspective. Sometimes I have even written down things I don\'t want to keep inside and burned the paper when I was done as a symbolic gesture of letting go. I am just glad that you have supportive people to go to and help you with tricks of the trade so to speak to handle this nightmarish image.
Keep your spirits up and be there for each other and eventually you may discover the reason your life needed to have that experience under your belt. I have found that, with all of the horrid things I have lived through, the experience has given me an understanding of something that I would eventually need to to know to help another person going through the same or similar events. That is always the silver lining I look for when things like this happen.
I hope you find your silver lining too.