Diary Instalment: 5th/6th May 2014
5th/6th May 2014
Wokie Up: 5th May, 11:12amSlept At: 6th May, 2:00am
Woke Up Really Depressed, Watched Some Videos Of Lady GaGa's Tour That Started Last Night, Then Tegan Chatted To Me On Facebook For Abit. Seen A Message Louise Sent On LittleMonsters.com Shortly After I Went To Be An Replied.
Radocto (12:13pm):You Dont Have Any Respect For Mai Emotions, You Said All That Knowing How Much It Would Hurt, An I Wont Forgive You For Making Me Feel This Way, Its A Very Horrible Thing To Do. So No, I Dont Wanna Talk To You Anymore Cause It Keeps Hurting, An That Is Mai Reason
Layed In Bed For A While Listening To XFM. I Need To Be Strong To Get Through Todai, Im Really Feeling Worn Down. Wrote On Mai Left Arm:
"V J J A D M L S A M M A"
Played Ourworld For A Lttle Bit. Renamed Mai Female Personality From "Madame Sasha" To "Zodiac". Started Looking For Zodiac Jewellery And Tarot Cards For Mai New Personality. Tried To Make A Facebook Account For Her But It Wouldnt Accept The Name, Feeling Really Pissed Off Todai. I Made An Interpals For Her Instead, I Wrote This In Mai Bio:
"I Am Madame Zodiac, I Was Born On The First Of May 2014 When Three Personalities Collided And Shattered Across Every Universe. I Am Here To Explore And Grow My Existence, To Learn Of Who Is Currently In Possession Of My Body =)"
And This In Mai Quotes:
"When The Imaginary Universe Exploded Into Existence, And Two Identities Created A Third, There Was A Silence. A Silence Neither Of The Trio Dared To Break Or To Speak Of. But As The Years Past, The Silence Grew Louder And Louder, Until It Could Not Be Contained Any Longer. Three Personalities Shattered Across Every Universe Until They Rejoined, Changing An Spiraling Through The Option Of Choice. And Thus, Something Was Born In An Ocean Of Pink Water, A Fourth Personality. A Personality That Would Not Be Denied Anymore"
Played XBOX With Dad Then Had A Bath, Mai Tummy Keeps Turning. Louise Messaged Me, I Dont Know How To Block Her On LittleMonsters.com, But I Replied Anyway.
Louise (6:39pm):I tried to suffocate myself last night, be cause I cant cry anymore I can't get rid of any emotions like pain,hurt and/or anger so I can't cope anymore so I tried to suffocate myself so I couldn't think any longer
Louise (7:29pm):But as you can tell my pillow wrapped around my whole face didn't work as I thought it would have done...
Louise (7:51pm):Could we maybe just talk things out a bit. You don't have to say much to me at all. I just think the it might be beneficial for the both of us? clear some stuff up? But if you don't want to I guess I understand... Can you just message a few words like okay let's talk or no I dont want to talk? Just so I know?
Radocto (8:06pm):Well Look, I Can Get Deeply Depressed Ova Things, Even If They Are Small, An I Have A Very High Jealous Line, When The Two An Combined I Feel.. I Cant Even Tell You What It Feels Like, You Know How I Feel About You, So It Made Me Very Angry That You Would Say All That To Me Knowing It Would Hurt, I Really Dont Understand :/
Talked For A Very Long Time, Added Each Ova Back On Facebook.
Radocto (9:58pm):Wanna Add On Facebook Again?
Louise (9:58pm):Yes please :)
Radocto (9:59pm):Okaiee, But.. I Dont Wanna Hear Anythng About Your Romantic Life If You Dont Mind
Started To Feel A Little Better, We Chatted On Facebook For A While, It Was Like It Used To Be, I Showed Her That I Wrote Her Name on Mai Bedroom Wall A While Ago. Then Uploaded Some Pictures From The Ourworld Game Onto Facebook. Sat In Mai Room Most Of The Night, No Music, Not Talking To Anyone Online Or Anyone Here, Just In Silence. Feeling Empty.
I Wrote A Short Article Titled "A Guide To Myselves" Which Gives A Detailed Look Into All Four Of Mai Personailties, When They Were Created, How They Were Created And Why, Along With Other Things :) Featuring Mai Fouth Personailities "Josh", "Radocto", "Rainbow God" And "Madame Zodiac", I Might Post It On Here Soon.
Wokie Up: 5th May, 11:12amSlept At: 6th May, 2:00am
Woke Up Really Depressed, Watched Some Videos Of Lady GaGa's Tour That Started Last Night, Then Tegan Chatted To Me On Facebook For Abit. Seen A Message Louise Sent On LittleMonsters.com Shortly After I Went To Be An Replied.
Radocto (12:13pm):You Dont Have Any Respect For Mai Emotions, You Said All That Knowing How Much It Would Hurt, An I Wont Forgive You For Making Me Feel This Way, Its A Very Horrible Thing To Do. So No, I Dont Wanna Talk To You Anymore Cause It Keeps Hurting, An That Is Mai Reason
Layed In Bed For A While Listening To XFM. I Need To Be Strong To Get Through Todai, Im Really Feeling Worn Down. Wrote On Mai Left Arm:
"V J J A D M L S A M M A"
Played Ourworld For A Lttle Bit. Renamed Mai Female Personality From "Madame Sasha" To "Zodiac". Started Looking For Zodiac Jewellery And Tarot Cards For Mai New Personality. Tried To Make A Facebook Account For Her But It Wouldnt Accept The Name, Feeling Really Pissed Off Todai. I Made An Interpals For Her Instead, I Wrote This In Mai Bio:
"I Am Madame Zodiac, I Was Born On The First Of May 2014 When Three Personalities Collided And Shattered Across Every Universe. I Am Here To Explore And Grow My Existence, To Learn Of Who Is Currently In Possession Of My Body =)"
And This In Mai Quotes:
"When The Imaginary Universe Exploded Into Existence, And Two Identities Created A Third, There Was A Silence. A Silence Neither Of The Trio Dared To Break Or To Speak Of. But As The Years Past, The Silence Grew Louder And Louder, Until It Could Not Be Contained Any Longer. Three Personalities Shattered Across Every Universe Until They Rejoined, Changing An Spiraling Through The Option Of Choice. And Thus, Something Was Born In An Ocean Of Pink Water, A Fourth Personality. A Personality That Would Not Be Denied Anymore"
Played XBOX With Dad Then Had A Bath, Mai Tummy Keeps Turning. Louise Messaged Me, I Dont Know How To Block Her On LittleMonsters.com, But I Replied Anyway.
Louise (6:39pm):I tried to suffocate myself last night, be cause I cant cry anymore I can't get rid of any emotions like pain,hurt and/or anger so I can't cope anymore so I tried to suffocate myself so I couldn't think any longer
Louise (7:29pm):But as you can tell my pillow wrapped around my whole face didn't work as I thought it would have done...
Louise (7:51pm):Could we maybe just talk things out a bit. You don't have to say much to me at all. I just think the it might be beneficial for the both of us? clear some stuff up? But if you don't want to I guess I understand... Can you just message a few words like okay let's talk or no I dont want to talk? Just so I know?
Radocto (8:06pm):Well Look, I Can Get Deeply Depressed Ova Things, Even If They Are Small, An I Have A Very High Jealous Line, When The Two An Combined I Feel.. I Cant Even Tell You What It Feels Like, You Know How I Feel About You, So It Made Me Very Angry That You Would Say All That To Me Knowing It Would Hurt, I Really Dont Understand :/
Talked For A Very Long Time, Added Each Ova Back On Facebook.
Radocto (9:58pm):Wanna Add On Facebook Again?
Louise (9:58pm):Yes please :)
Radocto (9:59pm):Okaiee, But.. I Dont Wanna Hear Anythng About Your Romantic Life If You Dont Mind
Started To Feel A Little Better, We Chatted On Facebook For A While, It Was Like It Used To Be, I Showed Her That I Wrote Her Name on Mai Bedroom Wall A While Ago. Then Uploaded Some Pictures From The Ourworld Game Onto Facebook. Sat In Mai Room Most Of The Night, No Music, Not Talking To Anyone Online Or Anyone Here, Just In Silence. Feeling Empty.
I Wrote A Short Article Titled "A Guide To Myselves" Which Gives A Detailed Look Into All Four Of Mai Personailties, When They Were Created, How They Were Created And Why, Along With Other Things :) Featuring Mai Fouth Personailities "Josh", "Radocto", "Rainbow God" And "Madame Zodiac", I Might Post It On Here Soon.
Replies