Depression Venting
I guess I am in depression. I feel sad, unhappy, lonely. Just down. I don't want to go anywhere, do anything(although we have been working on the house non stop) as we had a plan of buying an RV and going full time. Now we do not know what we want but the house looks nice. I really hate this feeling. We just had a murder/sucide in the neighbor. The neighbors said they were arguing in the garage and then he shot her then himself. The sheriff department said they were perplexed at even knowing what to do with it happening in a neighborhood like ours. i thought Gezz it's not where you live that things happen. but it was sad. Got me to thinking how short life is and yet I know that cause Ken left this world too soon. I wonder if this deep feelings of depression ever go away. Seems I am there all the time. I find no joy or happiness. does things ever get any better. I just can't seem to be happy anymore. It seems worse everyday. Try to figure out answers. Try to change how I feel just don't seem to know how. It seems the longer Ken's gone the harder it gets. Enough of me. Thanks for letting me vent..I think if anyone really knew how I feel they would probably lock me away. Sandi
Replies
Sandi, we all feel that way. I know I do and yet I think of my girls and know that they want me to honor them by living in some sort of joy. The numbness will never go away but each day must have some purpose. Trying to get to the center of this, is truly the answer for now. Blessings as you take things one day at a time. Remember that Ken has his arms around you so you can be uplifted. Love, Kathy
They would have to lock me away, with you. We would need a double rubber room, lol. I have been slipping into that depression hole again and I am trying so hard to stay out of it. I am going to be offline for a day or so. Just trying to come to terms with Dean\'s death. The retreat helped me a lot, but I don\'t think the pain ever goes away.
My late husband, Sam and I used to think of going to full time RVing, but it wasn\'t to be. Nothing has turned out as we had planned, but I never dreamed that I would lose my son too...
Well.....I was going to try to lift your spirits a bit, but I am depressed too. Just know that I understand and you are not alone.
((((HUGS))))....Julia
Oh Sandi. I am so sorry. That desolate despondent feeling sounds familiar. I take antidepressants and they keep me more or less on an even keel. I still cry a lot but do enjoy life now. I will never be the quirky me again. But I can laugh and take part in activities and feel genuine joy at times.
No, it doesn\'t get easier but I am finding that I cope better. I know what to expect - I just ride the wave.
I don\'t have answers but I think if it were me, I would see the doctor or counselor. I hope you can find someone who can support you and help you out of the dark hole.
As Julia said, you are not alone. Come here and vent - trust me, we do understand and care.
Love and huge hugs,
Marlene
There seems to be an ebb and flow of sadness that follows me. I have decided to just go with it. When I feel sad, let me feel sad. Then I seem to come back to a more even keel. You are so right, it\'s a crazy world out there. Sorry about your neighbors murder/suicide, really shakes you up. Glad you can vent with us.
Hugs, Debbie
I am with you, my friend. I also find no real pleasure in life, and do things because I feel I have to, not because I want to. I wish I had some answers for you, but I don\'t. My only reason for going on, is that I believe our Heavenly Father still has a purpose for my life on earth.
Gentle hugs! xxx
Sandi, it sounds like you are in the midst of deep depression. I take anti-depressants and could not function without them. Perhaps you should consider meeting with your doctor and try an anti-depressant. It takes a few days to make a difference, but I am a real proponant of them as they have helped me a great deal. Prayers and love being sent your way. Katrina
dear, dear Sandi........ do you have a piano that you can sit at to play??? I know how you love to play.... for me music is the best and only way to get through some days.... you are loved here, come by more often,,,,, hugs here make a difference too.... love ya!
Thanks for all you thoughts and comments and advise..I can\'t take antidepressants have bad reactions. I really felt I was moving forward but feel right now I don\'t even want to move. If there was a magic pill to take the pain away. Seems no answer. RV Fulltiming is on hold. We can\'t give our house away and the market is still so low. I think the other thing bothering me is since our friends started to get their house for sale we have not done anything together seems like forever I have to accept they are going in a different direction than us. I don\'t think I will try to have friends again. Everyone goes away. Sad as it is they have themselves in a big financially mess. I wish them luck...they did not know Ken so the few times I bring him up I see she does not understand. I am okay with that..love to all
Depression goes hand in hand with such a loss as ours. When I\'m feeling like I\'m in a black hole again I own the feelings and try to get moving. Being out in nature is a healer for me and also trying to move out of myself and be there for others helps. Even in those moments that I don\'t think I have anything to give somehow I do and I always receive SO much more in return.
Hoping that you can find some peace and know that you are not alone and that we are here walking beside you.
Loving care,
XO Joanie
i am rright with you. Spending lots of time alone. Needing it. Forgot a drr.\'s appt., unbelieveable forr me. (rthese rr\'s keep doublling up) just not quite \"with it\" lately. Got to let it go. A few steps forrward, anrd one step back. Love, Abby