Depression improving: Spring has sprung

I can tell it is spring; my depression lifts a little with every blossom and bit of sunshine while rain-soaked days send me to my corner, even as I periodically pace the house furiously. Poot, poot, poot, every step I take I sound like the little engine that could. POOT, poot, poot, poot, POOT, poot,poot, poot, and so on... How did that Eddie Money song go (or was it even him??)? Pooting my life away,/Pooting for a rainy day/ ooh me. It seems like it may be a reasonable day. I had a wild hair this weekend and finally gave away the couch and chair set that I have hated-yet been attached to- for the past three years. Too often when I tried to lay down on it I thought of cousin Cathy and how she used to lay/sleep on it her last few years. It was a connection to her that I will miss: But I can now find a couch that is comfortable for me. That thing was just too deep for me to be comfy on. Now I will deal with the guilt. Getting busy seems to have helped my depression even if it has sent me into a flare-up. I am dearly afraid that my u.c. is about to kick in. I am having pains across the middle stomach the last few days as opposed to the general ones across the bottom that I believe is the crohns. I just do not want to have to get into the rounds of drs. again. aaaaaargggg. I know it is acting up, I just do not want to hear about it. I must get started again though. I gotta. This round of volunteering has shown me yet again that I probably cannot hold down a job and I must apply for disability before I lose my widows pension. But just a couple of weeks of being steady busy has caused me pain, gas, and bathroom time. (Geez, reminds me I must get that bathroom painted if I am going to be staying in there again!)  Shut up vicky enough grousing for today, for now anyway.