Decsion
We got word today that mom's does need the level of care of the nursing home..This time she will be going in under Medicaid which I am hoping means that they will not be doing a 6 months evaluation...so she won't be up for being moved again into what is considered a Personal Care Home..so with Kentucky laws being different than most states..which I do not understand especially since having mom over 2 months now and see she is not capable of doing for herself...
They said that they should have a bed ready next week...Thanks for all the encouraging words..with mom...I did learn some things though that will help me as the time goes by and I visit ...before knowing what I know now concerning mom's memory and health...I have not really gotten angry but I have gotten upset at her over Ken's death and her showing no reaction...and that the crying was do to meds she should have never been on..and hopefully they will not put her on them again....but now that I understand her more and her memory will help me in dealing with her at the nursing home..Knowing that she does the best she can is enough for me now...People with this disease ALZ can not control what they know and what they don't...and the thing to do is to just enjoy them as they are...Maybe she does not remember I am her daughter but as she says to me each night...Your so good to me....and thanks me for it...so in the time she has been here I have learned...It may seem sometimes they are pretending...especially when you have never had anything like this before...you don't know..cause some seems like pretense..some seem real...it is a very confusion illness and if I have learned anything during these past couple of months....
That there is nothing easy about this disease...either to the one who is ill or the family..we have to come to an understanding that someone with ALZ may do things that we do not understand...or they may say or not say...or remember or not remember things and at time We without the illness want to just try to get them to understand and feel frustrated....but the thing I feel I have learned...you just have to let them be who they are now...just as losing someone to death...losing someone to an illness that takes them away from you is to be mourned...you have lost someone that your loved, that loved you, but now they are not the person you once knew...
My main thing I learned in dealing with mom at this point and it seems to make her happy..
I have learned to not correct her..
I have learned to answer her to the best I know how.
I have learned to help her when she needs it..
I have learned to show kindness even in the most trying times.
I have learned that at this point trying to convince her that I am her daughter is not the answer as that part of her memory is now gone...I have learned that the best thing it seems I have done is ...treat her as if I am one that just takes care of her needs...be soft...understanding...give hugs...give love...I have learned that to my mom, I am no longer her daughter in her mind...but I am someone that she feels will take care of her.
I have learned the most important is just show kindness, caring and love...even if she does not know who I as as far as her relationship to me..what is important is that she feels safe...
Sandi
They said that they should have a bed ready next week...Thanks for all the encouraging words..with mom...I did learn some things though that will help me as the time goes by and I visit ...before knowing what I know now concerning mom's memory and health...I have not really gotten angry but I have gotten upset at her over Ken's death and her showing no reaction...and that the crying was do to meds she should have never been on..and hopefully they will not put her on them again....but now that I understand her more and her memory will help me in dealing with her at the nursing home..Knowing that she does the best she can is enough for me now...People with this disease ALZ can not control what they know and what they don't...and the thing to do is to just enjoy them as they are...Maybe she does not remember I am her daughter but as she says to me each night...Your so good to me....and thanks me for it...so in the time she has been here I have learned...It may seem sometimes they are pretending...especially when you have never had anything like this before...you don't know..cause some seems like pretense..some seem real...it is a very confusion illness and if I have learned anything during these past couple of months....
That there is nothing easy about this disease...either to the one who is ill or the family..we have to come to an understanding that someone with ALZ may do things that we do not understand...or they may say or not say...or remember or not remember things and at time We without the illness want to just try to get them to understand and feel frustrated....but the thing I feel I have learned...you just have to let them be who they are now...just as losing someone to death...losing someone to an illness that takes them away from you is to be mourned...you have lost someone that your loved, that loved you, but now they are not the person you once knew...
My main thing I learned in dealing with mom at this point and it seems to make her happy..
I have learned to not correct her..
I have learned to answer her to the best I know how.
I have learned to help her when she needs it..
I have learned to show kindness even in the most trying times.
I have learned that at this point trying to convince her that I am her daughter is not the answer as that part of her memory is now gone...I have learned that the best thing it seems I have done is ...treat her as if I am one that just takes care of her needs...be soft...understanding...give hugs...give love...I have learned that to my mom, I am no longer her daughter in her mind...but I am someone that she feels will take care of her.
I have learned the most important is just show kindness, caring and love...even if she does not know who I as as far as her relationship to me..what is important is that she feels safe...
Sandi
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