days go by
Another day is coming to an end. I haven't heard from Eric.
I am missing him, missing our talks, and laughs etc. I'm sure he isn't me to bad. He had said he was going to see other people, and a women that is only a block from him. I am 500 miles away. I guess he isn't hurting like me. or at all. he is getting what he wants.
He told me for 2 years that he loved me, and he wouldn't ever leave us. Even if we were 500 miles away.. He told me that he always felt that we were brought together for a reason. Gee, what was that reason? ummm pull me in, and love me, then what?
He's never had a job in a the time i've known him, I knew he had anger issues, etc.. but I still fell in love with hm. I didn't judge hm because of those things, And now. he found a job, and now he doesn't know what he wants. What was I, someone to love and help him get through the rough times? now he's doing better so he doesn't need me?
He said to me, over and over for 2 years! That he would never end us. He knew what I had been through with other men, and would get so angry about how they treated me,, but now ..
he told me a few days ago... that he would always look at the signs, of him and I as he goes through his days. He said he still loved me, and wouldn't take down anything I gave him, or get rid of it. he would keep looking at our scrap book. So I wonder if he really is following through all this.?
I have been so faithful to this man, I have been so good to him. I don't understand why that when I am so good to a man, that they turn around and do this to me.
He said he didn't want tto give me false hope, but maybe he would one day want to call me up and tell me that he made a big mistake. He said he would be afraid to call me incase I was with anyone else. and I told him , he BETTER call me I am not going to see or talk to another man . I know who I gave my heart to, and all the things I've said to him, I meant them.
I miss him, I miss our talks. I was suppose to be moving there this spring..I was making plans.. WE were making plans..
Along with all this.. My mom is really sick. There isn't anything they can do for her.. and she even wants Eric and I to find out way back. She even called him and talked to him, Which my mom is a quiet women, and I was so surprised she did that.. but that is how much she wanted us to work. And Eric likes her too. He said that she was more like a mom to him, than his own mom.
I don't get any of this.. Eric knows that if he was with me, he would be loved so much , and I would be soo faithful to him. He could have as close to being a perfect relationship as anyone could get.
Anyway.. while he is out seing another women, I am just trying to hope and pray that he will find his way back. and get through the day and work and in the process moving to my daughters for a short time.
I hope that I can find a job somewhere anyway from here and start somewhere new. Maybe I will have a better chance at love. Or maybe I'm just not meant to have it..
I almost wanna give up
I am missing him, missing our talks, and laughs etc. I'm sure he isn't me to bad. He had said he was going to see other people, and a women that is only a block from him. I am 500 miles away. I guess he isn't hurting like me. or at all. he is getting what he wants.
He told me for 2 years that he loved me, and he wouldn't ever leave us. Even if we were 500 miles away.. He told me that he always felt that we were brought together for a reason. Gee, what was that reason? ummm pull me in, and love me, then what?
He's never had a job in a the time i've known him, I knew he had anger issues, etc.. but I still fell in love with hm. I didn't judge hm because of those things, And now. he found a job, and now he doesn't know what he wants. What was I, someone to love and help him get through the rough times? now he's doing better so he doesn't need me?
He said to me, over and over for 2 years! That he would never end us. He knew what I had been through with other men, and would get so angry about how they treated me,, but now ..
he told me a few days ago... that he would always look at the signs, of him and I as he goes through his days. He said he still loved me, and wouldn't take down anything I gave him, or get rid of it. he would keep looking at our scrap book. So I wonder if he really is following through all this.?
I have been so faithful to this man, I have been so good to him. I don't understand why that when I am so good to a man, that they turn around and do this to me.
He said he didn't want tto give me false hope, but maybe he would one day want to call me up and tell me that he made a big mistake. He said he would be afraid to call me incase I was with anyone else. and I told him , he BETTER call me I am not going to see or talk to another man . I know who I gave my heart to, and all the things I've said to him, I meant them.
I miss him, I miss our talks. I was suppose to be moving there this spring..I was making plans.. WE were making plans..
Along with all this.. My mom is really sick. There isn't anything they can do for her.. and she even wants Eric and I to find out way back. She even called him and talked to him, Which my mom is a quiet women, and I was so surprised she did that.. but that is how much she wanted us to work. And Eric likes her too. He said that she was more like a mom to him, than his own mom.
I don't get any of this.. Eric knows that if he was with me, he would be loved so much , and I would be soo faithful to him. He could have as close to being a perfect relationship as anyone could get.
Anyway.. while he is out seing another women, I am just trying to hope and pray that he will find his way back. and get through the day and work and in the process moving to my daughters for a short time.
I hope that I can find a job somewhere anyway from here and start somewhere new. Maybe I will have a better chance at love. Or maybe I'm just not meant to have it..
I almost wanna give up
Replies