days away from her attempt ,1st time
Hi guys, I know i have been very very fortunate in all of the divorce stuff. several things going on. Mother in law or x mother in law is in town and wants to see us. She is supportive of me and glad I have my son. sorta weird.. my guard will be up.
I have been having alot of emothional breakdowns, lots of crying..... My son and I are coming up to the 1 st anniversary of my X's attempt of suicide on thanksgivin night. My son found her on black friday, where she died and the EMT s revived her. My son seems on edge and I have a very close eye on him, we are going to try to do something different, our stuff. this years is a double wamy, we have thansgiving and frid and then we have the 24 th and 25th which were the days it happened. And of course Xmas and news years , well for the next 4 months HELL. every special date or holiday has an event that happened.
I should be happy, we are safe and healthy. Its just so so painful and fresh again.
I have been having alot of emothional breakdowns, lots of crying..... My son and I are coming up to the 1 st anniversary of my X's attempt of suicide on thanksgivin night. My son found her on black friday, where she died and the EMT s revived her. My son seems on edge and I have a very close eye on him, we are going to try to do something different, our stuff. this years is a double wamy, we have thansgiving and frid and then we have the 24 th and 25th which were the days it happened. And of course Xmas and news years , well for the next 4 months HELL. every special date or holiday has an event that happened.
I should be happy, we are safe and healthy. Its just so so painful and fresh again.
Replies
Hang in there.... this holiday season is gonna be the toughest. Be sure to keep yourselves busy... be sure to do things for yourself. Last year was my worst one.... if it weren\'t for my son having come back into my life, it would have been ugly. Thanksgiving started out good because I could go out and do things with other people - I spent Christmas Eve crying. Gifts that I asked for were to survive, things I NEEDED, not WANTED, and as I opened them, I KNEW asking for them was a mistake. My friend who also got divorced that year ran into the same thing.... she let loose with her anger when her kids were off with their dad and she shoved the Christmas tree over. I understand why she did it... and understand why she said it felt good. As I said, make sure you do special things for yourself this holiday season and when things hurt, remind yourself \"THIS TOO SHALL PASS\". Because New Year\'s represents leaving the old, beginning the new and everything will begin to change... in a good way. {{HUGS}}
Im sorry that you are feeling like this. First of all, your MIL loves you. You have become part of the family, and you are the father of her grand children and nothing is ever going to change that. When you see her, my suggestion to you would be to keep everything upbeat, and just enjoy her company. No need to bring up what happened last year the past is in the past.
The next 4 months, even though memories will make them hard, dont have to be. Its all in how you approach them. Over and over again I have heard Happiness is an inside job and I truly believe that. Its a choice. You can wake up in the morning and choose to think and be sad about what happened last year, or you can wake up and make this year all new and fresh. Its all up to you. Im sorry your son had to go through that it is horrible and traumatizing. What do the counselors say about handling the holiday for him? Perhaps you should touch base with them and find out what they suggest.
Understand that all of this is a process and you guys have done incredibly well. It will get better as time goes on and you will heal. Try your best to have a wonderful visit and a peaceful and thankful Thanksgiving Day.