Day of self discovery

Today I begin my first day of my 4 week journey of self discovery.  ITs' a time where I am setting goals regarding mind, body , and spirit.  I want to change my life.  I am giving my self permission to stop thinking of TTC. to at least September.  I want to take the time to really connect with my hubby, get in shape, change some bad habits, and focus on some businesses like a tutoring business and natural scented candles collection.  Its, time to really put this in God's hands for now.  I will still come on to write in my journey, but I want to try and stay away from the boards.  I feel as though God has something awesome for me and I want to REALLY seek him to find what it is, but anything that is worth having is going to take some work.  SO I really want to read, pray , and study God's word and find out what his plan is for me.  I want to continue to have a great marriage with my hubby as we have been through so much, plus I want to continue to get in shape.  I can't focus on baby making right now because it really makes me too sad.  This is easier said than done, but I really want to be happy.  I fear so many things in my life, I want to know where it comes from??.. Why do I think the way I do?? There are so many questions, and I really want to know me!!  SO here goes day one....