Day 97, morning
Today is day 97. Yesterday went much better than the day before. I got a lot accomplished and had fun, too. I don't know that it will always hold true, but at this moment, it feels like the things I have begun to incorporate back into my life tip me ever so slightly away from alcohol.
Yesterday I replaced a laundry room light fixture that I have meant to replace for at least two years, possibly longer. The light fixture has sat in a box leaning in a corner a layer of dust over it. It involved a few steps and modifying it to specifically fit where it needed to go. I broke it into its steps and over the last two days I did them. It feels good to have finally done it.
I'm attempting to flow fresh water into a stagnant pool that is my home, to flow fresh water into a stagnant pool that is me, day by day.
Over this time off, I have rehung photos and art on the walls (still some more to go), replaced blinds that were dirty and broken, cleaned gutters, replaced a broken light fixture, cleared a few years worth of cobwebs from the windows, corners and walls, a few years worth of dead flies from the window sills, restrung the laundry line and put out sheets and towels to dry so they can have that sun and wind outdoor smell. I still want to fix the grey water pipe, take some things to Goodwill, fix the security light, finish two areas that I started to paint but never finished...I've made a list of things I'd like to work my way through and I have broken each item down into steps. They won't be accomplished before my vacation ends but I have made a plan. They're on my radar, and as more things come to mind, I write them down. I will take them on one by one or sometimes switching between a couple, day by day, no rush, I'd just like a little forward movement now and then.
I have meditated, played piano, broke into my packed sheet music boxes, read, napped, sat and done nothing but listen to the wind round the corners of the house and whistle over the chimney and through the old antenna, gone to blue belt class, stretched, thought about goals and/or directions I'd like to go....personal ones, not work ones.
I'd like to see my world, my home, myself take shape again. Bringing my world back into focus is a lot harder than drinking. Drinking is incredibly easy and inviting. I've thought of will1864's journal entry All I Have To Do:
I don't have to feel that I must climb out of an ever-deepening hole.
I just have to change my course, one day at a time.
Today is day 97. I am committed to making a life change. I am beginning to see the benefit of the choice I'm making. I do not drink. I am the tree, not the leaves. I am the mountain. It is day 97 and I am solid.
Yesterday I replaced a laundry room light fixture that I have meant to replace for at least two years, possibly longer. The light fixture has sat in a box leaning in a corner a layer of dust over it. It involved a few steps and modifying it to specifically fit where it needed to go. I broke it into its steps and over the last two days I did them. It feels good to have finally done it.
I'm attempting to flow fresh water into a stagnant pool that is my home, to flow fresh water into a stagnant pool that is me, day by day.
Over this time off, I have rehung photos and art on the walls (still some more to go), replaced blinds that were dirty and broken, cleaned gutters, replaced a broken light fixture, cleared a few years worth of cobwebs from the windows, corners and walls, a few years worth of dead flies from the window sills, restrung the laundry line and put out sheets and towels to dry so they can have that sun and wind outdoor smell. I still want to fix the grey water pipe, take some things to Goodwill, fix the security light, finish two areas that I started to paint but never finished...I've made a list of things I'd like to work my way through and I have broken each item down into steps. They won't be accomplished before my vacation ends but I have made a plan. They're on my radar, and as more things come to mind, I write them down. I will take them on one by one or sometimes switching between a couple, day by day, no rush, I'd just like a little forward movement now and then.
I have meditated, played piano, broke into my packed sheet music boxes, read, napped, sat and done nothing but listen to the wind round the corners of the house and whistle over the chimney and through the old antenna, gone to blue belt class, stretched, thought about goals and/or directions I'd like to go....personal ones, not work ones.
I'd like to see my world, my home, myself take shape again. Bringing my world back into focus is a lot harder than drinking. Drinking is incredibly easy and inviting. I've thought of will1864's journal entry All I Have To Do:
I don't have to feel that I must climb out of an ever-deepening hole.
I just have to change my course, one day at a time.
Today is day 97. I am committed to making a life change. I am beginning to see the benefit of the choice I'm making. I do not drink. I am the tree, not the leaves. I am the mountain. It is day 97 and I am solid.
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The post hole digging..With ya\'s there