Day 2 with Jerry

Today has been a real roller coaster. This morning Jerry did re ognize me which was nice but he was mostly non communicative weak tired. We asked if he'd like to get out of the wheel chair for a while and that seemed like a treat for him. We offered chair or couch he wanted to lie on the couch. He was tired and started to doze but then started to choke. It took the three of us to get him upright. He was stopped breathing and it was horrible to sit there and look o. His eyes and want him to breathe but not sure if he would. But he did. Be was so tired. So he fell asleep sitting on the couch like that. We told the staff to watch him and left for lunch. We came back later and he was up but still dazed and hardly responsive at all. He looked terrible sad frail. He wouldn't talk or respond. We asked if it was too difficult to talk he barely nodded. He had difficulty breathing. Mar sat with him and in a few minutes he was back asleep. At this point I couldn't help but cry. We left both of us crying. Jerry seemed so close to death breathing was so hard. We went to run an errand and back home. I was in distress and so was Mar. We had plans for dinner with an old friend that it would be nice to see. But we stopped back to see Jerry first. He was back in his wheel chair and glad to see us. He still wasn't talking. We wheeled him in for dinner. He was having a difficult time wihh the soup spoon. Mar was upset and left the room. I went to him and asked if I could help him with the soup. I fed him the soup and he seemed to pick up a bit. They brought him meat loaf. They Sked him if he wanted a drink. He thought for a second and answered in a clear voice how about a diet coke. It wasn't a whisper for a change. He ate his entire dinner with a fork without help. He was alert and more there. It was ti
e to go mar said goodbye and I did too Jerry shook my hand but wouldn't let go. I asked if he wanted me to stay for a while and he smiled and nodded. So I stayed. I talked to him about small things told him stories about my kids. Jokes. We laughed together and had a nice hour or two. We watched some tv and talked. And fo the first time since I got here first time in 2 days he asked a question. In a clear voice he asked what time my flight was. I told him it's not tomorrow but hhe day after tomorrow. I told him I would see him in the morning. A little while later they asked him if he wanted a bath and he nodded. I told him I would see him tomorrow. He pointed at me and said in the morning right? That was our night. It was nice for him and me. I wish I could stay longer. I could take more time off work but I can't leave my daughter with her mom. She is not happy and I worry about her when she is with her.so I have to go back Monday.
Ar still warns me that I haven't seen the dementia rear up yet. What I hav. Seen has been upsetting but I have the belief that by being here it helps Jerry have some good moments that he would otherwise miss out on. I wish I could do more.