Dang
Its crazi how things turn out in life one minuete ur drowing in happyness and the next 3 years pass you by when your takeing and pushing love ones out of your life time and time again. Now there hurt scsred and confused. How do i move forward without always saying things i should have done. How do i speak to her in the new start. I always turn back to what i should have done. I dont want to be all talk i want to be action. I want to prove to her. Not threw my words cuz they are cheap. I have alot of guilt for the role i played in are marriage to are kids. I cant take things back i can erase old memories i have the power to replace the old with new. I do have the power in my self to change my way of thinking my actions towards her and my children and control my own life and be happy with what i have in front of me. Never look for more never look o i wonder what behind that cornor etc. Nothing at all. What is in front of me is what really important how did i become that man that always wanted more. How dod i become so selfish. Why did my anger and my hurt control my life when shit hit the fan. Why did i lose control of my self. Deep down i need it was comeing i knew it was on the edge i knew it was going to jump. It was to late to stop it. It was to late to fix it. There was nothing to save. There is a future for new start. Brand new everything. I want that i need that my heart pounds for my wife my soul yernd for her. I im so in love with her want to make it right now. Not wrong this time im understanding her pain and suffering. Im understand all of it im not arguing my case anymore in leting it go. Leting god take control of the future i dont control her i control me. My happyniess my future but i do pray and hope my future is with her...
Replies
I am in the same predicament. I love her, I want the relationship, our family. She is emotionally disconnected and won't let go of the past hurt I caused. We have both caused each other hurt. She actually started the hurt. She cheated on me. I have been angry ever since. I am also back and forth about quitting trying. I am a different better person for over 2 months! I am in counseling and a divorce support group. I know my mistakes and have changed my attitude. I get no closer to her wanting to reconcile. Don't know how long I can take walking on eggshells and still doing everything wrong even though I am not doing anything wrong. I am wrong for even going to church. Getting ready to pull the plug. She gets even more angry the better I get. ??????
Well if u look at itvthis way good let her get angry cuz she know she caused it she knows u can live without her thats why she is angry. My wife is not angry anymore and has told me she cant move on completly. That she misses me thinks about us alot idk im just there for her in the shadows. Im not pushing her any more its pointless. The moral of the story is if we get back togther awesome if we dont i will survive be a better person for my kids