Dad's new "wonderful!" attack

I cannot believe how bad the situation is for me.  I live in a household that does not understand depression and I have a dad who is so insecure that he competes with me in front of people.
Last December I had a heat problem in my condo and in the freezing cold I had to wait for 1 month for the heat to be restored.  It was a very difficult time and I did so much to get the heat back.  I had to call the company several times, the management office several times and I called the city to ask about my rights as an occupant to be able to get the company to restore my heat.  I thought that I learned so much in the process, I was on top of things and at the end was able to negotiate a good deal the the company for their bad service.
My dad today apparently, after one year, was saying that if it was him he would have restored the heat in 2 days!  One of our guests quipped if my dad thought that it was my fault that the heat was not restored in time! And apparantly my dad thought that I was reckless and could have done a better job!  I was with no heat when the weather outside was -15 Celsius, and my dad was postulating that he would have solved the problem in 2 days!
What is wrong with him. For some reason my self-esteem is hit by such comments!  I thought that my dad was proud of me of what I did and handled the situation.  Instead I realize that my dad would rather shame me in front of people and show what a great job he would do if it was up tp him.  How insecure can my dad be to do that!  It is so sad.
Unfortunately now I have moved back in with my parents because I am not working and I feel very depressed and that is what I have to deal with constantly.  It is horrible.  I have no idea when my dad would say such demoralizing things.  It robs me of good things I do.  Why do I have to face all this.  I have to go but this thing really is making me sad.  Now I am not well medicated and any small change is affecting my mood.  I don't know how tomorrow I will be feeling.  I am feeling bad now anyhow.  So sad.

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

My mother tells me off about the state of the house, not what I can do
She thinks I should clean and iron shirts to make my partner happy
WhatLife
WhatLife

Hi Jane,

I don\'t understand parents sometimes. After writing this journal entry I wrote my dad an email. It was very expressive and polite and I asked him what I wanted him to do. He never mentioned the email but things have been quite different since then. I hope that he got what I wanted to convey to him.

Stay well

WL